A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Should I lose my virginity to my friend? I'm 19 and I feel it's about time, but I've never been in a relationship loving enough to want to. I kind of want to get it over and done with so its not a big deal any more. And I feel really comfortable with this friend and I really fancy him.If you think its a good idea, how should I bring it up with him?Thanks Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, littlemissalf123  +, writes (28 January 2009):
 Whether you're 7 or 17, or even 37, virginity is still a big deal. You won't just be "getting it over with." By giving your virginity to a man you give him the opportunity to know you at the most intimate and personal level. You'll be connecting with him in one of the rare occurrences were femininity and masculinity combine to form a inseparable bond. I suggest you think about what your doing a little while longer before you "get it over with."
A
female
reader, Velma +, writes (27 January 2009):
Age does not matter. I was a virgin until I got married at age 32, mind you!!! I don't regret it one bit! No man is worth giving yourself to unless he is someone who you really love and who is ready to commit to marriage. Doing it for fun and just to find out what it is like is trash!!! I hope you seriously take this to heart that I am speaking as a mature adult and am only trying to help you and any of your peers who would listen. It is sad that so many people cannot stand any kind of peer pressure! But don't listen to any of your peers. Be strong and stand up for what is right! YOu will be glad you did. There is disease and everything else out there. I would be very, very careful and would wait as long as I could. If it is just a game of fun and doing what everybody else is doing, marriage will be very disappointing to you and there will be no point in getting married!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the advice. I think that I do like him more than he likes me, so it probably is a bad idea. I'm a bit worried that it will be ages before I get a proper boyfriend, and I'll be a virgin until I'm kinda old before it happens
...............................
A
female
reader, jackrabbitswifey +, writes (27 January 2009):
I think that if you have wated this long that you should do what is right but dont go and lose your virginaty to some one youll regret in a year down the road you want your first time to be special and not just for the hell of it. If you lose your virginty to your friend the relationship could never be the same again
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2009): I think it would be a mistake for u to sleep with ur friend just to lose your virginity.If u feel that u fancy him wat does that mean u like him? got a crush?what ask urself that .If u were to lose ur virginity to ur friend jus to do so ur going to be very uncomfortable to look at him hangout like nothing happend and mostly if u have feeling toward him and he don't. It will be difficult afterward the friendship is no more. Now if he likes u as well more then a friend it something different because then u guyz will have a reason to do so more then physical attraction.You have something to work toward like a relationship taking time to know each other better. DON'T sleep with him if ?Ø fellingz are involved from both part it would be a mistake ull end up regreting.Friend are not to be fooling aroundwith,love is wat matters. Take care Sherry=)
...............................
A
female
reader, Velma +, writes (26 January 2009):
I would advise you NOT to lose your virginity to your friend. Sex is something that needs to be saved for someone who you love with your whole heart and soul and for someone who you intend to marry. Sex is not to be thrown around like some trashy thing that you use whenever you want to. If it doesn't mean anymore to you than something casual, just to try because "everyone else is doing it", no one will ever want you for a lifetime partner. Trust me, if you wait, YOU WILL BE GLAD YOU DID!!!
This is a tough world with a lot of peer pressure and trashy people in it. You need to stand up for yourself and be strong. YOu only have one life to live!!! That is the very best advice that I can give you.
...............................
A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (26 January 2009):
 I'm not from the UK, but I've always been under the impression that you "fancying" him means that you like him? Have a crush on him? Romantically?
If this is the case, I encourage you NOT to sleep with him. Things get super messy if there are one-sided feelings involved and sex will affect it majorly! I personally would wait until you find a guy who will stick it out with you, have fun exploring with you.
Losing your virginity is, well, painful. One round of sex isn't going to be that magical. Sex gets great after more like 5-6 rounds, after your body adjusts, you guys find your groove together and can really have fun. So I would find a guy who will be there for awhile, have fun exploring and respecting you and your body. Having sex to get it over with is just NOT what it's cracked up to be. You will probably be disappointed, to be honest, and perhaps grow to resent that you lost your virginity that way. It's way more fun with someone you care about.
If both of you are attracted to each other, I guess what the hell? If you feel %100 sure, go for it. Just make sure everyone is checked up at the doctor, and good and protected.
Good luck and have fun!
...............................
A
female
reader, Shauna2009 +, writes (26 January 2009):
well i am now in my early 20's and have been in a relationship since was 16 however i had about 20 partners before my current bf. whilst i regret this to an extent it has made me who i am and my bf loves my experience and horny side hence wouldnt change it. i do however wish i ahd not have slept with so many people.
i believe you have a wise head on your shoulders as you are 19. how close are you to this male friend?? Is there any sexual chemistry? does he fancy you? Before you bring up any talk of sex it is a good idea to tread carefully, maybe he only sees you as a good friend. however if you 2 are def sexually attracted see how it goes. he may be up for it but u have held virginity for long time, do you want 2 throw it away now??
I personally am glad i didnt have 2 consider loosing mine it just happened.
...............................
|
