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anonymous
writes: My boyfriend & I Ended our 2 year relationship a couple of days before christmas. A few days later I found out that not only had he asked one of my best friends out, he’d also started dating – and had sex with – another girl. Obviously I was very upset and told him that I didn’t want him to bring her round to my house EVER. Apart from that I left him alone to get on with his life. Not long after, and during a very drunken night, I ended up sleeping with a very good friend of mine. I told my ex because we were both still trying to be as honest as we could about things. He was very angry about this and didn’t talk to me for a few days. He then found out that I’d seen this boy again a week later at a house party & went totally nuts saying that I should have shown more respect for him & that I should not see this boy until he has gotten over what I had done. I now feel like I cant do anything involving my friend in case he gets upset again. I’ve never told him that I don’t want him to see this girl because he should get on with what he wants to do. He, however, seems to expect me to cut my friend out of my life until he gets over it. My friend is leaving the country for a year in a couple of weeks & I want to see him as much as I can!I’m not going to stop seeing him, but do you think my ex is right to try to get me to stop hanging out with him?AM I being selfish & unreasonable by expecting him to just let me get on with things??
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2005): My ex still thinks he can run my life too. Why would you stop hanging out with YOUR friends because your ex says? Are you trying to get back with him? That's the only reason you should care what he thinks. I understand if ya'll are trying to stay friends and be honest with eachother, but be honest with him and say "hey, you dont own me, I do what I want, we aren't together anymore" What makes him think he can tell you what to do? Dont stop hanging out and doing what you want!!
A reader, Starr, writes (3 February 2005): Why should you care about what your ex thinks anyway? Look, let's stop playing dumb. You two are not together and the first thing he does is have sex with someone else and on top of that asks your bestfriend out just to show how much respect he has for you. I say if you choose to have sex with a million men it's none of his damn business. He gave up his advisor role long ago when you two part separate ways. Don't make yourself look foolish for this A-- hole. Have some dignity; go ahead keep seeing the guy if that is what you want to d. If he gets mad, tell him tell him exactly what he can do with his opinion.
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