A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My ex and I have been broken up for 2 years, have 2 kids together. Because we notlive in the same town the kids and I spend about a week there every month. Recently we slept together!When him and I first met it was a matter of us liking each other, sleeping together that then developed into a relationship. Do you think sleeping with him now could also be the start of developing into a relationship. He has been 'seeing' or rather sleeping with other girls so a big part of me thinks that i am just like the others. What do I do, tell him that we can only sleep together is we are exclusive? or sleep with him and hope it turns into something more?
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female
reader, baby-it's-you  +, writes (13 August 2010):
If a relationship is what you want I think it's better to talk about it openly with him. Rather than to continue sleeping with him while you hope it will turn into something more. What if it doens't turn into a relationship? What if he keeps seeing other girls? I think that will only leave you more hurt.
You probably know him better than anyone else. So I think you can discuss anything with him. If you really want him back, I suggest you talk with him about this.
Good luck!
A
female
reader, Denise32  +, writes (13 August 2010):
 If I were you I would not sleep with him in the hope that it turns into a relationship.
You say he is sleeping with other women, so what makes you think he wouldn't continue doing that?
Anyway, why did you break up in the first place? UNLESS the issues and problems that caused one or the other of you to end it, have now been resolved, the same problems are likely to come up again if you do start a second relationship - and then where would you be?
No, what you can do now is to have a frank talk with him and tell him that if you're going to give it a second chance, you will not expect him to bed other women. Then if he says he'll be exclusive with you, it's up to you to decide whether or not you trust him to keep his word, based on your past experience of his trustworthiness - or lack thereof......
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 August 2010): You need to talk. You're not going to determine anything about a committed relationship by setting up rules in the bedroom. The foundation starts with talking...then the heart, then sex. Well, maybe not entirely that order, but you get the point. Talk to the man. If you want to be together and the feelings are shared, it will happen. If you are just another lay, that's the route it will take. Love always finds a way. But you have to talk.
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