A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My bf and I have been dating for a year now. Anyways, there is a guy I work with, I am attracted to. I get along with him great, we have almost everything in common. I know, you probably know where this might be going. I am not planning or leaving or cheating on my bf, I will be faithful to him as long as I am with him. I love my bf. Anyways, this new guy friend and I have been talking a lot. I was wondering if it would be safe to hang out with my new guy friend? I would make my bf aware of us hanging out, we don't have trust issues. I am also wondering, if I keep this new friendship even if I am attracted to him, is this all going to put me into a deep pool of back fire?
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female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (26 March 2012):
 No it is not safe to hang out with this guy - you are attracted to him, so there is always going to be more than friendship and you will always be tempted.
A lot of people never 'plan' to cheat on their partners, but when they put themselves into scenarios where they are tempted then sometimes that gets the better of them.
So you have the opportunity here to avoid putting yourself into a scenario where you are tempted to cheat - therefore you should NEVER hang out with this guy.
He is a work colleague and nothing more, keep it professional and move on. If you love your boyfriend and want it to work then dont put yourself into a situation where you could do something stupid. We can all think we would never be unfaithful, but we are all human and we can do stupid things that are out of character sometimes. All you can do in life is avoid situations that make something bad happening more likely - and this is one of those situations that should definitely be avoided.
I hope this helps and good luck!
A
female
reader, Deagan +, writes (26 March 2012):
 Out of first hand experience, this WILL put you into a deep pool of back fire. It seems harmless at first, it really does, however you start developing feelings and start questioning the integrity of your relationship with your bf.
Don't do it. Friendships only work if the friends are NOT attracted to each other.
Quit while you're ahead, it's not safe, so just stay as coworkers and keep it as friendly and casual conversation.
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