A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:should i forgive my boyfriend of one year that cheated on me and neglected me when i was pregnant??
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks so much for your answers you have been very helpful :)
A
male
reader, roadman  +, writes (31 December 2008):
 4give and forget if you both love each other!!
People drift slip and slide in life...
If you love him and he seen his mistake then keep on going..I always have done..and I've had some great women around me for plenty of years..If you hang on to the fact they cheated then you'll just have a bitter connection with the person in question,which I find small minded myself..
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A
female
reader, SoftlyCaress  +, writes (20 December 2008):
 People will make mistakes but did he learn from it ? If you think he did and you love him then you should forgive him it will take time to learn to trust him again but make it clear screw me once shame on you screw me twice shame on me another words there wont be another chance after this one ......
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2008): Should you forgive him? That depends-each and every circumstance is very, very different. Many relationships have survived infidelities and moved onto happier times. But let's look at time frames here. So..he cheated and neglected you throughout this pregnancy which lasted 9 months. You state you 'were' pregnant...so I am assuming the child has been born. So are you saying that for the year you have been with this guy, he cheated and neglected you alot during this 9 month term of your pregnancy? Yikes! Truely that's not exactly commendable behavior on his part and it makes you wonder what your future will be like with this guy. However, the big question is: Is your bf regretting his actions? Does he recognize and take responsibility for what he did? Does he want to work this through with you. The reason I say this? Because even though you have a one year relationship, you also have a family. He still is the Father of your child. This baby deserves a happy home with a Mom and Dad who love each other. So you need to decide how crucial it is, to try and work at keeping this family intact, if you can. If everything has been discussed, the anger put away, then the focus now-is finding ways you can move on with your lives together, with a new and improved cheat-proof relationship and yes, it's possible. But it takes huge efforts on both your parts. Good communication will be the key to your road to recovery and ..forgiveness. Finding suitable solutions on how to prevent the same event in the future. Couple counselling is the key..really consider that. But forgiving your bf does not mean you will forget what happened, but it will mean that you have accepted what transpired and are ready to move forward without bringing the past into your renewed future as a couple. It will be difficult for you to blindly trust your bf again. Your trust will only strengthen, through the convincing, caring actions of your bf's. You cannot put him on a leash and monitor him all the time, and you shouldn't want to. Re-building the trust, passion and strength in your relationship may be a long term process. And remember, each and every person is different. And whatever decision 'you' make, you do what's best for you and your family. If you are both motivated to keeping your relationship intact, then do just that. Sometimes, couples are able to forgive because they both are wanting to make it work. If this is you and him...then I wish you both the best of luck...and have a wonderful christmas!
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