A
female
age
36-40,
*oulsis
writes:Would you feel insecure if your boyfriend went out to meet his ex girlfriend of 6 years with plausable reason? he says he had the intention of you going with him....he is still friends with her and all of his friends are her friends....what advice does anyone have for me?
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ex girlfriend, his ex, insecure Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 June 2008): If he wanted to be with her, he would not be with you!
Remember it is his ex, you are the present love of his life. Do not let him know that you are jealous and don't be insecure.
He he wanted to cheat on you, he would not have told you about it.
Trust him.
Good luck!
A
female
reader, uraqt9697  +, writes (10 June 2008):
If he had something to hide, he probably wouldnt have been honest with you about going to see her. If you are uncomfortable with it, share that with him, but if he hasn't proven himself to be untrustworthy, then I wouldn't worry about it too much. Maybe you guys can come to some sort of compromise about it until you feel 100% comfortable ie he will call you before he hangs out with her etc etc.
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A
female
reader, misfitschik66  +, writes (10 June 2008):
 i personally would feel uncomfortable... my boyfriend is still friends with his ex and it bothers me she asked him to go play pool with her (knowing full well i lived an hour away) he said he would... i told him that i dident want him too
so respectfully he dident go
you should tell him how you feel and if he respects how you feel he wont go
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 June 2008): I wouldn't like it at all...I would just be upfront with him and tell him how you feel. If you don't like it and you think it is inappropriate be sure to let him know...and if he thinks your objection is ridiculous and he goes anyways, then you know what kind of guy you have on your hands...you can take it or leave it...
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A
female
reader, CharmmyKitty +, writes (10 June 2008):
 Honestly, I would also feel uncomfortable and insecure, even if he had a perfectly good reason. But I don't think it's necessarily founded. I think it's natural for everyone to feel a little leary about this kind of thing.
You'll just have to tell him how you feel, and do your best to keep from being jealous/bitter/catty/ or accusing. (I don't know about you, but I have a bad habit of doing those things when my guy does something I don't particularly like...)
But he does have a right to be friends with whoever he wants, even if it's an ex. You should know if you can trust him or not, and that's all you can do. He should be able to understand where you're ccming from, so don't be afraid to let him know you need that extra reassurance.
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A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (10 June 2008):
 Is there a reason you can't go? Did he invite you along? I don't think that there's much to worry about unless he's proven himself untrustworthy in other parts of your relationship. Sometimes a relationship isn't right between two people, but a friendship will last forever.
If their friendship seems genuine and he's a trustworthy guy, then just bite down and be okay with it. It's totally okay to feel insecure (I would too), but part of a relationship is trust and demonstrating that will make you all that cooler of a girlfriend.
Good luck, sweetness.
xx India
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