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Should I continue my relationship with a man or try to find another woman to be with?

Tagged as: Friends, Gay relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (2 May 2011) 1 Answers - (Newest, 2 May 2011)
A female Guam age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I am a bisexual preferably oriented towards females. And, I have been having a difficult time finding a nice girl who feels the same way. I have had several girl crushes, and each did not go so well. The most recent was with a good friend of mine.

We slept together one drunken night, and I understood quite well that that night was only a one-night stand. But, my feelings for her started to develop again (I asked her out a few months ago, and she accepted... but I cancelled because I was afraid that she was only using me as an experiment - I seriously regret this). Well, we got closer after that night... but a month passed and our friendship started to get a little complicated.

I felt as if I had a chance to be with her. She even hinted at it when she said that she was going to break-up with her boyfriend because it was not going so well... and we could do "stuff" together (We still did "stuff", but she felt bad because she has a boyfriend). Well, a few days ago, I was left crying on the phone telling her how I feel. And, she said that she doesn't feel the same (because I am one of her good friends and being in a relationship with me would affect our friendship), and if she was going to be in a homosexual relationship it would only be for lust. Oh, and she is also straight?

A couple of days after, I am in a relationship with a guy ... but, I don't feel good about it. I still care about my friend and don't know what to do. Should I continue my heterosexual relationship even though it sort of makes me feel sick and trapped, or should I break up and continue to search for a girl (or try to “woo” my friend) even though it may lead to a heartache?

Note: I am in a relationship with a guy because I feel as if my trying to find a nice girl is not going anywhere (They are either straight, taken, or don't see me as anything more than just a friend). And, I feel horrible knowing that this guy really cares about me. But, as much as I try, I do not feel the same. I also have a better chance at being in a relationship with a guy than with a girl. But, again, I do not feel good about it. What is reasonable to do?

View related questions: crush, drunk, has a boyfriend, she has a boyfriend, trapped

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A reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2011):

If you feel sick and trapped in any relationship, leave.

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