A
male
age
30-35,
*igMac92
writes:Okay well my mother has brought to my attention that i will never meet a girl unless i start dressing better. See im 18 and i wear funny graphic t-shirts and shorts all year round(I live in NY and i still wear shorts in the winter). I can see her concern because ive never had a gf and she thinks my choice of clothes. Is right about this and should i change my style.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2011): I don't mind graphic t-shirts, but not all the time. If its your main fashion thats okay, but i suggest getting some nicer clothes too. Ladies like to be treated out to a nice dinner some times and if you are wearing shorts and graphic t-shirts women will see you don't so that. Buy some jeans and simple black and white maybe blue shirts. You don't have to get all fancy. My boyfriend wears band shirts all the time, but he has nice clothes too. Polo shirts, button up strip shirts, plain gray shirts. Just go to a Sears or JC penny's and buy something. Its cheap and they have nice stuff.
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (12 April 2011):
 I agree with your mother. Like I just said in another question on here today, guys would benefit from looking after themselves a bit more! Do some grooming and you will see the ladies will find you more easy on the eye. If you wear the same thing all year around, at every occasion, with little care of fashion etc, you can come of as lazy, inattentive, a slob etc. You are basically sending out a message, and if that message doesn't reflect who you are then you should change it. Clothes make the man they say. While personal taste is all good and swell, you can still wear it with style.
Wear jeans that fit you and are snug around your bum, wear nice t-shirts with prints with if you like that, but try on a sweater every now and then, and a nice shirt for special occasions or when you want to look a little extra nice! Shirts can be used every day. There are also shirts that are not super fancy, like shirts with shorter sleeves, you can roll up the sleeves, shirts with prints on etc. Jeans are great, but a nice pair of black trousers work with almost everything as well.
What's funny to you isn't always funny to the girls, just remember that! If you wear a "funny" t-shirt you might be appealing to a younger audience such as kids, or teenage boys. They are not the ones you want to attract, you want women! Not geeky teenage boys!
You will also benefit from a general grooming, women like men who keep a good hygiene and pay attention to their looks. Not over the top, but fix your hair. Get a hairstyle that suits you! Fix your beard/mustache as well to a shape that suits you, or shave it off. Don't be all about what you think looks cool, look out for what actually matches your face and body type! Your goal is to look good! For that to happen you must focus on what actually suits you. Shorts generally is something to wear on the beach or when the weather is hot enough, unless you got stunning legs you need to show off.
Got any female friends you can go shopping with? Perhaps even your mother? Trust in your mother, I think she knows what she's talking about. Alternatively you can always shop online and ask her what she thinks, or bring home clothes for her to approve of or just hand the unused clothes back to the shop.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2011): wear jeans in winter. End of.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (12 April 2011):
 Shorts in the winter ?? In New York ?...yes, I see how that may generate some problems.
Whether we like it or not, style is not neutral. What we wear , garments, accessories- are signs, are icons- they send a message, they talk about us, our age, our socio-economic class, and most importantly about our preferences tastes quirks personality etc.etc.
Of course the message could be deceiving or misleading . I I still would be a couch potato with a gym outfit on, - and also a girl with a very low cut blouse can be sexually inhibited . But,people can discover what you really are only when they stick around enough, with time and observation. At first sight, you have to make do with the impressions you give by things like body language... and what you wear.
So, be aware of the messages you send.
I used to live in NY too, New Yorkers are the most jaded people in the world aand normally they don't bat a lid if they should see you wearing , I don't know, a clown outfit and red stiletto heels. They are used to everything.
But , shirts in winter ? NEW YORK winters ? That would draw a few puzzled stares. That says " weirdo " . " Misfit " Socially maladjusted " or "wants to impress at all costs ".
All off-putting messages. Particularly for women.
So my advise is, yes, listen to your mom, and go get yourself a pair of jeans or kakhis or something. You 'll still be you, with your unique personality- just less disquieting !
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A
female
reader, KeighleySky  +, writes (12 April 2011):
 Maybe try wearing jeans sometime instead of shorts. I like funny graphic t-shirts and im sure other girls were but to be wearing shorts in the winter is a bit strange even in America. Try wearing a nice pair of jeans and try and find out what colours suits you. Usually if you have dark hair black an white look really good. Also if you have dark brown eyes try blue shirts, its weird but it makes brown eyes tsand out. If you have blue eyes try grey shirts, itll make the light flecks in your eyes stand out. Same with green eyes. try experimenting a bit, youll only know what looks on you best that way :)
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