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female
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anonymous
writes: I'm 16 years old and I have just gotten back together with my ex Tom. We have been dating for about 10 months now, but we have broken up 4 times already (but no longer than 2 weeks). About a month and a half ago, he cheated on me (he kissed another girl) so I broke up with him and we talked about it for the next week or so, and he apologized. So now we're back together. He said he would never do it again. I just don't know how I am never going to trust him again. Because I love him so much and he says he loves me, but I don't want to look stupid giving him another chance after he cheated on me (my friends nag me about it all the time) and plus I think one of my friends likes him. So that's another problem. I want to be with him but I don't want to look stupid in front of my friends. What should I do? and should I really be forgiving him after he did that to me?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2005): Everyone makes mistakes...its if you learn from them that counts. Give him another chance if you believe this was a one time deal, was he feeling ignored or unwanted by you? Although everyone is responsible for their own actions take a truthful look if you were contributing to him feeling a way that would make him more vulnerable to the situation. Although if he does it again....get rid of him..
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2005): sometimes its hard, he probebly does love you more than anyone but it takes two to tango and sometimes people can get caught up in the moment and kiss someone they don't fancy, give him a 2nd chance he kissed someone not married them, it was a bad thing but people learn from their mistakes and it would be a mistake if you let him go because 10months is not a mistake.
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reader, lucy +, writes (2 July 2005):
Instead of thinking about looking stupid, think about your self value and your pride. You are worth much more than someone who can settle for second best. Unless you feel this was really just a one off and you can sort it out, i think you should dump him because cheaters are losers. xx
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2005): You are setting the stage for the rest of your life. if you start accepting treatment such as this now you may end up putting up with this for the rest of your life.
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reader, Blunt +, writes (1 July 2005):
You are worried about looking stupid? Well if that's not what you want then you shouldnt take him back. Once a cheat, always a cheat.
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reader, Joe Mamma +, writes (1 July 2005):
This is the perfect age for you to set a precedent for your future love life. How much ARE you willing to take? Looking stupid in front of your friends is not the main issue here. The main issue is deciding how you feel about yourself in the context of a relationship and how you feel you should be treated. It's a very personal decision, but go with your gut, I'd say. Only you know whether you really trust him again or if you're staying for some other reason. Habit, perhaps? Or the status of having a boyfriend? Something to do every Saturday night? All I can say is be true to yourself, and expect your guy to do the same. And think about this: Do you FEEL stupid for giving him another chance?
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reader, becky05 +, writes (1 July 2005):
Dont worry abvout your friends for a start.give him this chance to prove himself to you and if he cheats again, dump him for good!
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