A
male
age
41-50,
*wiked4u
writes:OK I have a situation. I've been seeing my girlfriend for about three months. I screwed up in the beginning by sending a sexual message to another woman. I didn't put much thought into the statement. Well anyway she seen it. How can I reassure her that I'm not doing those types of things? I truly love this woman.
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female
reader, blahblahblahh  +, writes (14 July 2010):
 Even if it was at the begginning of your relationship why would you do that? I doubt you can justify yourself to be honest, as a woman know for sure as soon as I found out you'd text another woman in a sexual mannor i'd be off. By doing 'that kind of thing' in the first place is enough said, that doesn't signify good trust and respect, I think you need to ask yourself more the question why did you even do that in the first place? Maybe you're not ready for a serious relationship.
A
female
reader, Myrrh +, writes (14 July 2010):
 Hello. But you were doing that type of thing. Hence the problem. First impressions are lasting but hopefully you can recover from this. Im in agreement with the other posters. Dont tell her it meant nothing. Someone did similar to me once and said it meant nothing. Im not talking about you now. But this is the impression i got when he said that to me. Huge, huge risk..when might he do it again! Incredibly stupid man for risking our relationship for "nothing". If he could send things like that to other women then i obviously wasnt "doing it" for him. All negative, hurtful thoughts. I was reassured to the Nth degree and we got over it but it took a while before i was prepared to trust him again. He changed his phone number as a gesture of his new found comittment to me, which meant a lot because that was a hassle to do. As someone said. Its actions not words. An unwise action caused the problem. So roll your sleeves up and get to work with actions if you want to rebuild a stronger relationship. Be the best you can be and i hope things work out.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (14 July 2010):
 What do you mean. "it means nothing " ?
Everything in life means something...
In this case, sending sexual texts to another girl means a) that your girlfriend cannot trust you not to do things behind her back b) that you have not even been 3 months together , and you were already itching for something new sexually ( Or at least this is how she is bound to see it and I understand it can be unflattering to say the least )C) that you are the type of guy who thinks is "cute " or "cool " sending dirty texts D) that you do things on impulse ,without putting much thought in them....
now, I don't want to make it sound as you were planning a terrotist attack :)- in fact, I think yours was a minor slip up. But just to show that every action speaks volumes about us, and every actions has consequences... You will have to just bear the consequences, be on your best behaviour, reassure her by facts not words, and be patient if it takes some time. Trust can be rebuilt, but not instantly.
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A
male
reader, andre23 +, writes (14 July 2010):
erase the number of the other woman in front of her and tell her that she means nothing to you. explain that it was just a guy thing and that you are not cheating on this woman that you love
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