A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:It's a bit sensitive situation andi need an advice.We have a customer who at one point did a huge favor for us that it resulted in bringing us quite a bit of business. On her part it was absolutely effortless. She is kind and generous lady, retired, she made us known to a certain part of society, and now our clientele changed for the better and so did our business. What she did for us is really a big thing. What's happening now is the following: she keeps asking us for favours back. We are in a luxury items business, handmade. To make one piece requires a lot of time and effort. My husband already done for her 2 pieces, which took him a whole week. And of course we can't charge her for labor, and I have a serious suspicion that she doesn't expect us to. Yesterday she came again with 3 more projects. I don't know what to do. My husband is overwhelmed with work, we are taking orders now for May. And here she is with her things that need to be done by April as she goes on a cruise. My husband told me he is going to work all Sundays just to finish her pieces. And it's all for free. I don't understand how we are going to go on like this. I wouldn't mind doing it for her once a year, but not every couple months. I can't imagine how to even start telling her my thoughts and doubts about it. But it can't go on like this. She definitely turned around our business, but it's not like she did any work for it. She belongs to the high society ,and she simply started telling people about us andit went from there starting with a fundraising where we went and introduced ourselves. My husband after her yesterday visit was noticeably down, and didn't say much, so I am assuming I have to play bad cop in order to prevent it in a future, but any ideas on how to tell her that we can't do it for free for her anymore, or at least in that quantity. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2015): Wiseowl, there is no doubt she did a big thing for us, and as I said, we don't mind at all doing work for her for free, but not in that quantity and in that short periods of time. Her projects are huge, complicated, and of course she appreciates my husbands craftsmanship because he is really good. But this kind of work takes a very long time. YouWish, she helped us by offering first to come to fundraising where we donated something, and she put us in a news brochure. And then she just told people about us repeatedly when they asked about her things that my husband made for her. But that's did the job. By saying she didn't really do any effort, I mean that she didn't do extra rather than just telling people about us. Our other customers do it all the time, it just happen to be that she know A LOT of people and they are people with money. Yes, time spent is what put us down, my husband has to work weekends just to accommodate her. He still needs to do other work for us to live on, and hers comes as extra. I was just wondering how long it can go on. Honestly if I was her, with her money, even if I referred people and knew how much I helped, I would never let people to work for me for free in that extent. If it was something small, then yes, but not hours and hours of work. Thank you all for answering
A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (18 February 2015):
 Actually, I think you may have a golden opportunity here if you know how to play it right. Instead of looking at what she did for you as a one-time event that she may or may not be taking advantage of (I know you're starting to feel resentful for it), but the opportunity is that she's realized that you're an ongoing asset. Now, a smart business owner/operator would consider the value of HER as an ongoing asset as well.
Can you be more specific about how she helped you? What are her contacts? Can she put you in contact with people directly where you can network even more business or a better or more efficient distribution chain? Who she knows, if she's high society, may be even more valuable than the unspoken "gentleman's agreement" that so far you've only equated with your gratitude towards one event.
I've been in your shoes before and felt the same way you have. It was a mentor of mine that is giving me the advice that I'm giving you. The best money spent is to create raving fans that are influential. She's smart enough to keep the relationship you have in her favor. Now, how do you capitalize on that?
Instead of having the "I don't think we can continue doing this for free" conversation just yet, tap HER as a resource, and she still may have good value as that. And don't dismiss what she did for you as "effortless" when she spread the word for you and got you business. That is the purest favor she could do for you.
Take her to lunch and pick her brain and get her working for you. You have needs, whether it's capital (investing), distribution, personnel (if you hire people, you want good quality), resources (saving costs and keeping quality standards), everything.
From my understanding, what's got you and your husband down is the time taken? Talking to her, you can turn that conversation from a "We can't do this for you anymore" into a "we're strapped for time, and the business you sent my way is creating a time crunch for us." Do you have employees that assist, or are you a one-man proprietorship? If you are, is that where you want to remain??
Make the dilemma something that your client can help you solve, rather than vent your resentment and possibly turn her into the instrument of bad press. If she did what she did for you, it's because she believes in you and likes your work. That can be used to your advantage. Mine and glean her contacts and spheres of influence. It's all "who you know".
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2015): Handle it delicately. She's high-society, and one word from her can turn the tides against you. You and your husband have to learn about "bartering." When someone scratches your back, you scratch theirs. She has brought you a clientele who will pass on more business to others. She has given your business what some people pay thousands; if not hundreds of thousands for. Advertising and endorsement among the rich.
Most new small-businesses fail shortly after they begin. Don't be ungrateful. What she did for you has no price-tag on it.
What you can do, is just let her know that you have a lot of orders ahead of hers; and you will get on it as soon as you can. You don't have to brown-nose, or bow to her demands.
If she is making unreasonable demands, let her know that the paid orders have priority; and you wouldn't want to displease your valued paying-customers who must come first. Let her know; whenever possible, you'll try and squeeze her ahead. Then do it!
Be ever-gracious and polite. She knows the value of what she did/does for your business; she's no fool. So doing something free for her, will keep the good clients coming in. When she is asked; "where did you get that?" Guess who's names and business come to mind? When at parties and socials, she's mentioning you; and she brags about how wonderful you are to her. Socially, she is also opening doors for you and your husband. Making you fantastic contacts in her social circles. Giving you a short-cut to success, and a major business-advantage.
Just don't jump when she says jump. Give her a reasonable time-frame you might get to her order as a "favor to her." Always refer to it as a "favor." This will put things into proper perspective.
She's a bit spoiled and used to having her way; but she doesn't own your business. You are offering her complimentary merchandise; in exchange for sending in new business. That's "bartering." I do it all the time. I sent a friend to a lawyer I know. She won a decent settlement. I got a Rolex for my birthday last year. The lawyer-friend sends me concert passes and front-row seat theater tickets on Broadway. I have a list of other businesses that my company will offer deals in exchange for major discounts. We get free office supplies and etc.
She isn't taking advantage of you, she can afford whatever she needs. By coming to you, she is giving your business prestige, her personal-endorsement, and telling everyone about you. Word of mouth is the best advertising, and friends tell friends, and they tell their friends.
Look at it that way, and you'll reap many benefits; and she'll say wonderful things about you. As will the customers she has sent your way; who see first-hand that what she says about you is true! That is, if your products/merchandise live-up to the praise.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (18 February 2015):
 I think that you could offer her a discount and she can wait for you to do it on your time frame.
IF she wants rush pieces then she has to pay full price.
and you don't owe her as long as the clients keep coming back to you. you only owe her for the initial referral.
I think your debt is paid.
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A
female
reader, Midnight Shadow  +, writes (18 February 2015):
 You need to say "Mrs _____ we appreciate what you did for us, but we can no longer give you these things for free" or "we can only give you one of the items you mentioned for free".
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