A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I have been thinking an awful lot about my ex boyfriend( we split 2 years ago!! i know, together for 8) i feel down and weepy recently- - yes ive been out with other guys - we split as he said he didnt love me anymore and starting seeing someone else - no he wasnt cheating beforehand -(it lasted 2 weeks he cried to me when it finished)we keep in contact every few of weeks i go for coffee he comes over for coffee and moans about being 'stressed and depressed' what im really saying/asking is i dont like feeling like this- shall i just cut all contact with him as its doing me no good? please some good advice would me muchly appreciatedthanks
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female
reader, MuffinGirl  +, writes (28 September 2008):
 You were not exactly particular of what you're feeling right now (except crying and feeling down). Are you still in love with him? If you're tell because in that case i'd give you different advice than now.
But I suppose you're not, so my answer to your question would be yes, you should cut your contact with him. If somebody makes you moody and down, then you really should do that. You don't need to listen of his problems if you don't want it to. I think the main problem in your relationship is that you two are too much connect and used to seeing each other too often (probably because of 8 years being together). But that is not the proof there is love or any similar feelings between you two. So if you feel he's making you sad, then really don't have any reason to stay friend with him, although you care about him. Talk to him, tell him you don't want to see him anymore (or so often) and listen about his problems. If you're not so strong that you will able to rub him out of your life, i suggest see him only once or twice a year (maybe on chrismas or on special events)
Tell him you want to have better future and you want to forget him, because future is the thing which is important for you now. You're not getting any younger, neither him. Don't stick of your past, if there was just rubbish and pain. I wish you all the best.
A
female
reader, x~Optimistic_Help~x +, writes (28 September 2008):
if being in contact with him and having coffee every couple of weeks is getting you down then i think that maybe you would be right to cut contact with him... at least for the time being until you are completely 100% over him.
Being in contact with him wont help to make the process of getting over him any easier...whereas if you are not seeing/talking to him then it will make it a bit easier. Also getting rid of all the things that remind you of him will help
But ultimatly you have to do what you think is right for you...
noone else can tell you that but yourself
Good luck =] x
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