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Sex with him is painful and has caused me to bleed! Any advice?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (15 November 2006) 4 Answers - (Newest, 15 November 2006)
A male , anonymous writes:

I've been going out with my boyfriend now for just over a month, but we're having terrible trouble having sex.

My boyfriend is not my first sexual partner, but everytime we attempt to have sex the pain is unbelievable. I've slept with men more well endowed than my boyfriend and had no problems, but with my boyfriend I find it really painful and the most recent time it caused me to bleed. The first time we had sex was ok, a litte painful but nice, but since then it's been terrible.

Anybody have any advice?

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A male reader, davie Australia +, writes (15 November 2006):

You probably have a haemorrhoid down there. I'd had regular anal sex for about a year with no problems and then all of a sudden it was painful and bled. It turned out I had a haemorrhoid.

Apparently if you eat lots of fibre, drink plenty of water, and take something like metamucil then they can go away in about six weeks (which I know is a long time!). The idea is that by making your bowel habits extremely soft that no strain is put on the haemorrhoid (which is a swolen blood vesel or something like that) and it will go down or back to wherever it came from! Drinking green tea I have read can help, and so can taking warm baths.

I'd advise you refrain from receptive sex until it gets better.

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A female reader, trausis04 +, writes (15 November 2006):

In a past relationship I was in a similiar situation. Unfortunately I never put a finger on what exactly caused the discomfort, BUT I narrowed it down.

1. If you are using a condom, is it the same type you've used before. The discomfort could be caused by an allergy to latex or the makeup of the condom. This typically makes it practically impossible to "get wet and stay wet" throughout

2. Are you having sex in a different position than before? Is he using more forceful motions?

3. Do you feel comfortable/turned on during sex with your partner? Being tense could cause something to go wrong.

---Sex feels different with each partner... keep that in mind... but if you are having pain **I would suggest talking to your doctor about this situation!!

GOOD LUCK

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A male reader, Thomas17 Singapore +, writes (15 November 2006):

Thomas17 agony auntAs what thena said, see a doctor.

the first thing i imagined was that your boyfriends penis was too big to fit... pain over pleasure you may ask? id say pleasure is much better.

so..see a doctor and see whats the cause of it yea.

hope ive been of some help

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A female reader, thenabear +, writes (15 November 2006):

thenabear agony auntWell the problem may very well be with you. Not that your doing something wrong in bed. But that you may have a medical problem causing you pain and bleeding. Sometimes yeast infections in the early stage. Or pressure build up on your cervix can cause pain and bleeding. If you know it isn,t you medically. Then consider his shape. Is he curved or straight. Does the shape bend at all. Believe it or not A penis needs to fit a vagina. You can,t go craming thing's were they don,t go. I would go down the list for starters. See your doctor first and make sure your not having a female problem that could be causing this. Accually I deeply incourage you to see your doctor. Often cancer growth, or some cysts can cause pain during sex. Take the time to see a doctor. Never risk your health.

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