A
female
age
30-35,
*liviab
writes:im haveing these bigg promblems in school. im 15 and in the 9th grade.this boy i really liked asked me out i really like him ALOT AND HE LIKES ME but theres these girls that i guess hates me so they told him to brake up with me.he dident but i broke up with him becuz i dident want all that drama but i really like and miss him! but they got sooo mean and they started telling him hes gay and i look like a MAN. becuz of people in school i have a very low low low self esteem.afther all that they told him that i was cheating on him when i never step close to another guy =(my 2end problem is i have this issue with looking at boys in there eyes or girls and i come out rude becuz of it but im really not if u get to no me im really sweet and funny.so i dont get why these people would hate me of all people!I NEED ADVICE FAST...(thanks)
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female
reader, Maiflower  +, writes (23 October 2008):
You sound so much like my little sister! She had a very similar problem. The guy seems like he was ignoring these people, so thats would you should do to. Anyone who treats you like that is not your friend and therefore why should you care what they think!? Next time they tell you you look like a man, tell them that the androgeny look as actually really 'in' at the moment anyway. And if they tell you he's gay, smile and say well at least I'll have someone to shop with! If you learn to take these comments and laugh at them for the pathetic people they are they will soon get bored. The fact you are showing it is upsetting you will make it worse! Your second problem, the eye contact thing, is incredably common. Especially with low self esteem. But here's what I reckon you should do. Sit in front of a mirror and practise looking into your own eyes and talking confidently about something (your day, hobbies etc) slowly you can teach yourself a false confidence that will eventually manifest. I am NOT telling you not to be yourself but a little bit of front goes a long way. And you finish with you dont know why these people would hate you, well I have one word - jealousy. They either envy you because he likes you or for some other unfathomable reason. Ignore it and if anything feel sorry for them. Because as you say you are a nice person deep down, they obviously arent, and people do eventually see others for what they are. Sorry this is long, but hope it helps.
A
female
reader, VeryConfusedSpeaking +, writes (23 October 2008):
 Hello im 15 years old also im suffering from the same problem as you expect in this case the guy is doing to me what your doing to him.. iv learned that its best to talk to him about it... it might not change anything but atleast he would see what you were going through... and if you to really like each other no madder what other people say you will end up being together... most people only talk trash about a couple becz there jelouse... so dont let them destroy your relationships! just try your best to ignore them..... :) best of luck _VeryConfusedSpeaking_
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