A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Me and my boyfriend have been together for about 3 years and 5 months now, and in that we have spent more than 2 years in long distance but he is coming back to the US soon now and we have decided to move in together and get married in a couple years. But recently everytime we fight me or him feel like breaking up. At the time we fight I feel I cannot stand him anymore but I really love him and we both cannot stay without each other. We decided to take a break but that never happens because we need to talk to each other every day. What should we do? I am confused as I think distance is a huge factor in this.
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female
reader, Artistry +, writes (29 March 2008):
 Hi, You two were together for a long time, before you were separated by distance. It appears that you two are very close, you talk all the time, you are connected, this is good. The fighting has been recently and that could be due to the distance factor as you say. I think if couples fight, as long as you fight without trying to destroy each other, in other words, if you know how to fight and how to stop, then the fighting is not a deal breaker. People in relationships, need to have disagreements in order to
define the boundaries in the relationship. You must respect each other and the values of the other person, if you have a disagreement. You love each other, that doesn't mean you will always agree. When he comes back, I would suggest that
you not move in together immediately, get to know each other again, without living together, then decide if you want to move in together. This will give you the time to
re-establish the relationship and re-introduce yourselves to each other without being together, day in and day out. People change, you need to know who the other is right now, take the time to do that, and you will probably have a stronger relationship as you do, and be ready to take that step of moving in together, with a better result in the end, hopefully. Take care and try to be as happy as you can be.
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (29 March 2008):
 Everyone is entitled to their opinions.
Do not force your opinions on others.
Take it or reject it and move on.
Agree to disagree.
Try to stay away from contentious issues if you can .
Find those common grounds where it will build up your relationships.
Do what you have to do when you come to the bridge.
...............................
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