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female
,
*iora
writes: Dear CipidI have a fiance whom I got engaged on 16th April 2006. We want to get married on 19th August 2006. The problem isthat my Mother-inlaw doesent want the wedding to take place since my fiance is a bread winner for the family. She thinks that when i got married to him he will stop helping them which is not like that to me. Please help me I love my man and we dont have any problem to get married on that day. Help me
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, DrPsych  +, writes (11 July 2006):
 At the end of the day, it is up to you and your man to pick the wedding day. Your mother in law has a right to disagree with the marriage (everyone will have a view) but not to stop the wedding. Basically she cannot stop the wedding if you and your man stay strong. You will have many tests and stressful events in your married life with your husband - we all do! There will always people from the outside trying to stick their beak into your business. You should treat this problem as a test of the strength of the relationship. My parents didnt approve of my marriage plans (for different reasons) but I got married anyway. Your man has to learn to stand up for what he wants. If or when you have children together then the financial relationship he has with his mother will have to change, or maybe you will be wanting to buy a house together. Marriage is as much about shared financial plans as love and support. I am not saying he shouldn't support his family if he wants to as it is admirable that he takes on this responsibility, but he will have a wife and possibly children sooner or later and must balance his responsibilities. This is a really for you to discuss with your husband-to-be. He must not be bullied by his mother, and neither should you - it is your special day and you both have to stand up for what you want.
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