A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm in a relationship with this amazing guy. we were set up through my friend and his cousin. This thing is His cousin went out with my friend but the friend was always unfaithful. She's manipulative, she wrecks peoples lives and she hurts peoples emotions. I've only started seeing this now. I dont want to be friends with someone who hurts other people and tries to ruin relationships. Shes tring to ruin mine by setting me up with her cousin. Obviously I told he " I love my boyfriend ( which i do ) " and all she said was " I wont tell him " in which she really will even though I wont do it. I dont want to be her friend anymore. I can't tell my man about what she's really like incase her and his cousin get back together. And if i don't she can easily manipulate him as he gets jealous easily how can I get around this???
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female
reader, Kyra23  +, writes (3 April 2013):
Short and clear: manipulative and friend are two words that shouldn't be in the same sentence. Focus on your boyfriend as much as you can...try not to spend to much time alone talking to her and be very firm when she says some inapropriate like trying to set you up with her cousin. And OP is right you really should talk to your boyfriend about her stupid ideas. Honesty is the best way of not being ambushed by nasty people.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2013): "I can't tell my man about what she's really like incase her and his cousin get back together. And if i don't she can easily manipulate him as he gets jealous easily how can I get around this???"
OP, She's not so powerful that she can ruin your life unless you let her. You can't "get around it", you have to stand up for yourself or at least pretend that she's not that threatening to you. I would start by filling in your boyfriend on how she's trying to set you up with her cousin. I would mention it in passing and tell him it irritates you. I wouldn't make a big deal out of.
What I don't understand from your post is how she could "easily manipulate" your boyfriend and it sounds as if you're not telling the whole story here...I could understand why her insisting on you dating her cousin is socially tone-deaf and irritating, but based on what you've said, it seems like bit of an over reaction to claim that she's ruining your life. Has something happened between you and this cousin that you're trying to hide?
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