A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I feel like my male friend is shutting me out and it's making me upset. He is also my ex-boyfriend, but we have been broken up for almost two years now. Obviously I had to stop talking to him for almost a year to get over him (he broke up with me, and was really angry with me when I told him I had to stop talking to him for awhile). But when we got back in contact, everything was great and I was happy we were friends. We live about 8 hours apart, so I never see him, but we text and email a lot. But over time he has stopped confiding in me. He used to tell me that he missed me, how his family was doing, if he was working on any new projects, what was happening in his life in general, good or bad, but now it's just very short, blunt answers, and only if I initiate the communication, otherwise he just doesn't. I was sure he needed space*, so for two months I didn't get in contact with him hoping he would text me. Nothing. So I texted him last week about it, and he said that he doesn't expect me to keep in touch with him, that he understands that I have a life to live and he respects that. And when I asked if that meant he didn't want to be friends anymore, he said that wasn't what he meant, but to take it anyway I wanted to. What does that mean? I'm really hurt by this and don't know what to do about it.*He has shut down on me before when he's got a lot on his plate, but he usually clues me in on what's bothering him and then wont go into details. Which is fine, because I would just tell him that I was there for him if he needed to talk and I would give him space.
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (6 July 2010):
It means the time has come for you to move on from him completely. The first, best reason for all this happening is that he has a new girl in his life and he's putting her first. But it sounds to me like he's completely over you in every way, and that the time has come for you to move on from him and move forward with your life.
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