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female
,
anonymous
writes: I have known this guy for 5 years. We dated throughout the 7th grade until now off and on. I am a freshman in college and he is still a senior in high school but we still talk. I need advice because I feel like he is losing interest in me now, like I am old news. I know a good thing when I see it and he is it. I want him to see that I am good for him. Of course I am not the judge of that but I don't think he will find anyone that will love him like I do. But the thing is he doesn't see that. I think he thinks I'm just one of "those girls" that is just a chapter in his life. He tries to be a player but at the same time he still calls me and stuff and won't let go. I want him to experience other people when he gets to college but it hurts so bad because what we had was different. I want him to see that, not just me. I don't know if leaving him alone will make him realize or just make him forget about me and i am so confused. How can I make him see?
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female
reader, StarNews +, writes (2 January 2006):
 If you are sensing the relationship is becoming unstable, that is a pretty clear indication he is losing interest. You know you love him, you know you are a good thing for him, but you cannot make someone see what they dont want to see. He is seeing what he wants, and Im sorry to say this, but from what you say, he wants out and wants to play the field. He is slowly fading out of the picture and stringing you along in the process. He is not being totally honest with you about his feelings, and that is selfish behavior.
You are right about one thing, you should let him go. I would have no contact with him during this time. If he truly misses you, he will contact you. If you love him, the only thing you can do is let him go. Keep busy with your friends, school and outside interests. He is consuming your thoughts and you sound miserable and unhappy. With time, you may discover that you are happier and better off without him.
A
female
reader, mjp81 +, writes (2 January 2006):
Have you ever heard the saying, if you let something go and it comes back to you it's yours forever and if it doesn't it was never meant to be? This is pretty true to form. Go on with your life for now and have fun in college and experience new things in life, and don't sit by the phone waiting for him to call. I'll give you some good advice on how to make him miss you, but if it doesn't work, than just move on. First off don't try and make him jealous, to make him come back. This may work at first, but does not form a lasting bond. Don't call him. if he calls you, don't answer, return his call the next day. When you talk to him, act like you are having the time of your life, even if your not. Always end the conversation first, this leaves him wanting more. Last, you are young and will have many loves before you find the one you are meant to be with, and i hate to say it but if it's meant to be than love will find a way. I will recommend a book to you called "How to get your lover back, and make it better than it was before" not only does it tell you what to do, but gives your self esteem a boost too. Follow it exactly do not give into temptation or it won't work. Good Luck!
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A
male
reader, Joe  +, writes (2 January 2006):
ok, i want you to ask yourself when was the last time you and him were able to go out alone and spend some real quality time together? some quality time always goes down well :-)
i know it's probably hard for you to get the free time now your in college but IF you can try do something, anything you can think of that will surprise him in a good way, something that should let him know just how much you love him and i'm sure it should sink in for him that he may just love you as much as you love him.
hope i was of some decent service
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A
female
reader, mommyofthree +, writes (2 January 2006):
 Well, everyone in a relationship likes to believe that they love their partner like no one else can, unfortunately if he doesn't see it that way then there is not a whole lot you can do to change his mind. I would say that possibly finding a new man would make him realize how much he misses you but that is a game where the new guy will be getting hurt in the end and it isn't very fair. You may find that you will have to accept that itmay be over for now, in time he may see that you really were the one for him but I wouldn't waste my college years waiting for someone that doesn't know how good he has it. Go out, have fun, and meet new people in time he will be just a memory. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, beenthere +, writes (1 January 2006):
You can't make him see anything but you seem to expect him to be a player which might make him think that you're not that interested. Find out how serious he is about you. You both need to concentrate on your studies and that can cause people to drift.
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