A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi I am a mom of 3 and a working wife but I strive to do everything right in my relationship. However I have recentlyh found that my husband would rather look at porn than inniate sex. I take good care of myself and he tells me I'm beautiful so why would he do this? Its causing distanced between us and it hurts to find out that this is going on. Help please.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (12 July 2012):
 have you asked him why?
to be honest porn is faster and easier for men than the whole
foreplay
oral sex
intercouse
after play
wash up
make ice cream
cuddle
porn is "rub one out be down in ten minutes" kind of thing.
maybe he's tired... you both have three kids and work... right so maybe he's afraid you will turn him down...
who knows
HE KNOWS... so you have to ASK HIM.
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (12 July 2012):
 He is escaping into a world of fantasy and excluding you. The initial reason why people get married is because they want a sanctuary to go to every night, they want their spouses to take care of them in a way that other people can't. You have to express to him whenever he watches porn it's like he wants to get away from you. It's okay to watch it once in a while but not okay when your needs are not being met. He could have a problem maintaining erection too, if porn addiction is to be blamed. Porn is not creating distance. He is. What happens if you watch it with him? Perhaps you need alone time together. Maybe send the children to a babysitter and ask him to bring you to a romantic dinner. If he is reluctant to even kiss and hug, there is a bigger problem. Ask him if this is how he wants his marriage to be, because you don't want a roommate, you believe intimacy should be there as long as you live.
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