A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:This is not the first time we have fought. Yesturday on the way to drop our 6 year old daughter at school my husband told me if I got out of the car he would run my bitch self over. He didn't mean it literally but it hurt that he said it. He was angry because I told him her science fair project was due in two days the night before when I realized it was actually due the next day. He was angry because I was stupid in not reading the paper properly and therefore he had to get it ready in the morning. I tried to talk to him and let everything out on the table that was bothering me after we got home. (A lot bothered me). From him pulling the ear, hair, and wanting to spank my son for every thing he did wrong. I asked him how his mother and my mother would think about him calling me a bitch. He then went on to use my past (adopted)(not know my biological father) against me. Saying things like my daddy who no one knows not even my mother would *f* me and in more details-cruel things. Then went on to hurt me more by telling me my adoptive parents really were not my parents just my step parents and degraded our relationship with them. I then told my husband I was tired of it all and would rather want a divorce at that time. He then apologized on paper and verbally. Today he is now telling me things aren't all together better because he is mad I did not apologize for telling him what I told him after we got home from dropping off my daughter. He would never hurt me physically-but I sure am tired of being hurt mentally. Should I just keep pushing this under the rug?
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2010): by any chance is he the one that tells you your stupid also? He sounds abusive and even if he said he didn't mean the running over thing he could have at the time. If i was a kid growing up and saw my dad say something like that to my mum i'd ask her to pack her stuff and run, i'd want her to be safe as i couldn't trust him not to flip out and hurt her one day. I think you need to leave and i don't think he's safe. He is aggresive and abusive. Please get away whilst you can.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2010): YouWish is spot on..this is serious, and even IF YOU would consider staying put and working this through, your FIRST priority is your children, especially your son, do not for one minute longer tolerate any abuse of your children, that is their right from a parent to do everything possible to protect them. Leave this abusive man, don't make excuses for him or yourself for tolerating it any longer.
You owe it to your children to be able to grow up in a safe, non abusive home, and this is not that!
Jilly
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (18 November 2010):
Yep, I'm with the others. Get the hell out of there.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2010): i can relate to you alot. my husband used to do that all the time. and then he would always want me to apologize after he had verbally hurt me a lot. i was just so fed up with it that i left him for like 2 weeks and didnt talk to him at all. he kept calling and when i finally returned his call he was the happiest guy ever. i had a long time with him and layed thing straight ever since he hasnt done it when there is love he will never hurt u.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (18 November 2010):
 No, don't push it under the rug any longer! He's verbally abusing you! In addition, he has anger issues. It's unnecessary to get bent out of shape over a simple mistake. Not that big of a deal, it will get done. If this marriage is salvageable, I say anger management classes for your husband in addition to marriage counseling. Then again if he's always been like this then he's not going to change. I suggest slapping him with a divorce. You don't have to put up with that abuse.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (18 November 2010):
 Are you really serious?? You're getting mentally and verbally abused and threatened (threatening to run someone over isn't funny or a joke), but that's secondary to the real problem.
What dark place is this coming from that he is suggesting that your dad would sexually abuse you???
Why the hell are you allowing him to abuse your son physically (and I'm sure emotionally too)? Even if you're not strong enough to leave him because of your own abuse, FIND THE STRENGTH to save your son!! Those scars do not heal! What is he doing to your daughter?
This is not a man to reason with. This is not a man to protect by sweeping it under the rug. How much more pain and abuse must your son take before you make the change and get away from him?
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