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My Girlfriend of 5 years sexually flirting with her brother.

Tagged as: Family, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (15 September 2009) 4 Answers - (Newest, 15 September 2009)
A male United States age 41-50, *uildt2000 writes:

Hello everyone. I am new to this site. I hope you will give me honest advice. Last year I found an ICQ message from my girlfriend to her brother making a comment that said "thats because your so good at sex". How would she know that? I did not tell her that I found this in her ICQ. The only reason I looked at this is because I have observed their odd behavior in the past. Overly friendly is the best way to describe it. I confronted her if she ever had sex with him. She said absolutely not and that they just have a different relationship and our close and can tell each other dirty jokes. So I just took her word, but remain cautious. I also get a weird feeling around him sometimes. Kinda like he doesn't want to get to friendly with me. She has two younger brothers than this one and they are very friendly. My girlfriend and this particular brother are two years apart.

So the kicker for me is that yesterday 9-13-09 she had the door closed in the room where she uses her computer. I thought this was odd and asked her. She said she was listening to a song and didn't want to bother me while I was on the phone. Which that part is true. I found this conversation on 9-13-09 with my G.F./"Ann" and her brother Ben on ICQ. I do not think this kind of sexual flirting is normal between siblings. Or is it? Does this imply something has or might happen between them? Thanks so much for all your help. My stomach is in knots, I don't know what to do.

Scroll down and read the below from the bottom up.

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:10 PM

To : Ann

sometimes you gotta let those little horns come out.... hee hee

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:10 PM

To : Ann

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:10 PM

To : Ann

Yes it is!

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:10 PM

From : Ben

It's all good

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:09 PM

To : Ann

right! You know that I LOVE You!!! but I think we're both just a little

'pervy' - but in a good way.... LOL

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:09 PM

From : Ben

haha

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:08 PM

From : Ben

OR...  thinking me perv but liking me anyway !

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:08 PM

To : Ann

right! not too many understand the way WE do!!

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:08 PM

From : Ben

without thinking me a perv*

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:07 PM

From : Ben

Who else could I share that with that gets me like you do ?....  ( which

thinking me a perv ..... )  haha

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:06 PM

To : Ann

awesome! thanks for the laugh!

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:06 PM

From : Ben

I coulden't help myself

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:02 PM

To : Ann

it's not bold from my end

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:02 PM

To : Ann

Too Funny! Good One Ben!

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:02 PM

From : Ben

somehow I turned on bold  text

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:02 PM

To : Ann

help, my face is hurting!!!

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:01 PM

To : Ann

LMMFAO!!

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:01 PM

From : Ben

squirting some tears

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:01 PM

To : Ann

Yup, Yup! Here too!!

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:01 PM

From : Ben

grinning  like an idiot over here boss

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:01 PM

To : Ann

You're hilarious - remembering the song and relating it to the comment!!

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:00 PM

To : Ann

Bawhahahahaha! That's funny

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:00 PM

From : Ben

dirty*

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:00 PM

From : Ben

told you it sounded sirty

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:00 PM

From : Ben

PINEAPPLE !!!

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:00 PM

To : Ann

You're gonna kiss my PINEAPPLE!! ha ha ha

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 1:00 PM

From : Ben

"baby when I touch your hair"...  " I feel lectricity in the

air"                                                  " I'm gonna kiss your

eyes.... then I'm gonna kiss your neck.....  then I'm gonna kiss your

tummy.........

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:59 PM

To : Ann

I feel electricity in the air

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:59 PM

To : Ann

I'm Your Sister! I'm Your Sister!

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:59 PM

From : Ben

only if yell " I'm your sister"

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:59 PM

From : Ben

stupid song  but wait for it

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:59 PM

To : Ann

you want me to lay on the floor too?

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:58 PM

To : Ann

Ditto!

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:58 PM

From : Ben

hehe

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:58 PM

From : Ben

I want to see you tonight

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:58 PM

From : Ben

oh waht

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:58 PM

From : Ben

got something to tell you

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:57 PM

To : Ann

ok, I'm listening now

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:57 PM

From : Ben

song*

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:56 PM

From : Ben

let me know when your listening to that sing

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:46 PM

To : Ann

my email is still receiving

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:45 PM

To : Ann

not yet...

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:45 PM

From : Ben

did you get it ?  are you listening to it ?

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:42 PM

To : Ann

ok

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:34 PM

From : Ben

check your email and listen to that song

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:31 PM

To : Ann

nope

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:31 PM

To : Ann

hold on, I'll check

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:31 PM

From : Ben

Do you have the B-52's  song  called  "strobe light"

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:29 PM

To : Ann

LMAO!!!

Date : 9/13/2009 Time : 12:29 PM

From : Ben

I love you and your PINEAPPLES ?  that sounds dirty 

hee hee

View related questions: flirt, I love you, text

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2009):

run away from this one......gf has the HOTS for her brother. wil not be the first family embroiled in an incest scandal.

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A male reader, Longterm United States +, writes (15 September 2009):

I don't see a problem here. It just reads like a brother and sister who are comfortable with each other.

And it is perfectly normal for brothers to be unfriendly to their sister's boyfriend. That's called "doing your job." :)

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A male reader, buildt2000 United States +, writes (15 September 2009):

buildt2000 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thanks for the reply Old Guy. So maybe I am over reacting? Looking forward to more well thought out answers. Appreciated :-)

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A reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2009):

What I read in this is two people who are very close. Siblings that are quite close in age can bond that way. They might have been each others' main support through a difficult time while growing up. They may have grown up in a particularly uninhibited family -- or reacted to really inhibited parents by opening up about that stuff. Her comment about him being "good at sex" could simply be from him having dated one of her friends -- or him boasting to her.

It's possible that something else has gone on -- it's not like sex between siblings has never happened. But honestly I don't see a smoking gun here.

You have to decide for yourself if you can be comfortable with the situation. Her being so close to her brother, and him treating you oddly, isn't going to make your relationship any easier. But I wouldn't make more out of it than there is.

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