| A
female
,
*abi
writes: My fiancé is hurting inside and won't let me in!Hello all,Me and my fiancé have been together and living together for a year and a half now, and I have always known that he finds it hard to open up and talk about things but I think he is really hurting inside.His childhood wasn't brilliant, he lived with his father happily until he was 14 but when his father re-married he fell out with him and ran away to his mothers.At his mothers he got into drugs, rather badly, and was in and out of jobs and never got any qualifications. Now he is 24 years old and can't find a decent job nor a course without paying money that we do not have. I find that he gets quite paranoid, easily (maybe due to the drugs in the past).Well anyway, we went to his father's birthday party over the week end and he got quite drunk and sat on his own most of the night. When we got home he was very angry and went into the spare room and started to punch the walls and his electrical equipment and he was crying.He kept saying its not fair and that it was family stuff and he didn't want to talk to me about it, I managed to calm him down and get him to bed and he mentioned in the morning that he felt his dad was avoiding him all night.I think that he may regret moving into his mothers and getting into drugs, especially now that he see that his dad is 'well off' doing home improvements, has a studio and nice cars etcI just don't know how to talk to him or how to suggest that he talk to his father. He has always had problems talking to people and although he hardly talks to me, I think he opens up to me most, but still not enough. He wouldn't seek professional help either.I think that there is a lot going on in his head right now and he needs to talk to someone. Does anyone have any tips to help him open up?
View related questions:
drugs, drunk, fiance, money Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, lillaum  +, writes (31 October 2005):
 Hi there
A lot of people have trouble opening up. It's hard for us not to push them into talking but we must try. Some times people who dont talk are the people who rather deal with their problems on their own. Try to let him know that if he does talk to you, you wont take over, That all you will do is listen and be there for him.
Good luck
Lillaum
|
