A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Most of the times that my fiance Nd I have sex he plays out me to be a virgin and that his taking over me and he says things such as, ( no one can hear you, can you feel that pressure while its ripping your thinght virgin p***y.) Or he covers my mouth or holds me down so I won't move. I really love him and want very much for him to be part of my life, we are very happy and he showes me he loves a lot. It's just makigng me confused to why he always, well most of the time we have sex, he plays out this role. Should I be worried or alarmed about such behavior, because when I talk about it to my friend she keeps saying that its wired and that maybe he likes underage girls, what should I do? Please help.
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female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (27 May 2012):
 Creepy and scary.
Role playing should be consensual, just like the sex.
I'm glad you turned the table on him, he REALLY needed a wake up call.
A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (27 May 2012):
 This isn't just dominating, he's acting out raping you. You want to be with a guy who gets off thinking about raping virgins? Even now that he's stopped being vocal about it, he's probably still thinking it given that he still acts rough and dominating. He should really go talk to a mental health professional. I know a lot of people will say it's just harmless role-playing because he's not actually raping you, but he's a guy who gets off on it and that's bad enough. You even said he needs to get rough at the end most times in order to get off essentially because just normal consensual sex isn't enough. You shouldn't marry him until he tries to deal with this.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2012): Thanks everyone for your input. Well one day when him and I was having sex I took controle and I did the same thing to him. I made him out to be a virgin and that we was much younger. I did it just to see how he would react, and he said he didn't like it very much. He said he understands how I feel now. We make love to one an other but it seems he don't know how to make just sweet love because while we are doing it he always wants to do it rough at the end. His from Asian and I heard that most Asian men are very dominant, so I'm wondering if that has anything to do with it. I have talked to him a few times about how it makes me feel uncomfortable in how we have sex. He said he understood and that he was sorry he had parts into making me feel this way. He has gotten better but he still likes taking complete controle in the bedroom. I don't mind him taking control, or him being rough every now and then, but it seems some how or during us making love he has to be rough at the end.
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A
female
reader, Foot-In-My-Mouth  +, writes (27 May 2012):
 He's acting out a rape fantasy. It's sadistic. Do you enjoy it too? Or does it leave you feeling humiliated?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2012): it may not be a nice conversation but you really need to talk to him, a lot of couples use role play and it can be a part of a healthy sexual relationship but if it is making you confused or worried you need to tell him or he may think that you are enjoying this particular game
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A
female
reader, AuntyMacassar  +, writes (27 May 2012):
 Role-Playing can be normal, but it has to please you both. I believe that if you do not also enjoy this rough fantasy, than it is a bit sadistic sounding.
Does he play out any other fantasies with you? Do you make wonderfully sweet gentle love together, also? Does he complain if you do not wish to play the virgin fantasy some nights? Does he have a difficult time reaching climax when not in virgin-fantasy mode? Is there any hint of true meanness on his part whilst you guys are involved in this fantasy?
Role-Playing can be fun, but mind out that one certain fantasy is not becoming an obsession with him, and, as I said, the fantasies should be enjoyable to you, as well. If they are not, he should not be making you perform them.
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