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My fiance is a sex addict and it feels like our relationship is just about sex

Tagged as: Sex, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (30 July 2015) 3 Answers - (Newest, 30 July 2015)
A female United States age 22-25, *ola_montez93 writes:

My Fiancé and I have been together a year. We have always enjoyed sex and have it quite frequently, 4 to 6 times a week. The thing is though I feel as though my sex drive is going down and I don't want it as much and his is going up and always complains that we don't have it enough. Sometimes I just want to lay down and relax without having to worry about him trying to touch me or have sex. He makes me feel bad about not wanting to do it so I usually cave in. He's made sure to tell me our relationship isn't just about sex but that's how it feels lately. Anyone dealt with this?

View related questions: fiance, sex addict, sex drive

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A female reader, Euphoria30 Germany +, writes (30 July 2015):

Dear OP,

I believe that you got engaged very soon with a man that is young and horny.

Don't marry him if you can't believe him that this relationship is based on deeper emotions. Don't let him make you feel guilty for not satisfying all of his needs. Stand up for yourself and if he can't accept you as you are, you are with the wrong guy.

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A female reader, jls022 United Kingdom + , writes (30 July 2015):

The reason he keeps doing it is because you cave in. He doesn't care that you don't really want to do it, because to him getting his needs met is more important than what you want. Which is fair enough to a certain extent, since YOU are the one who needs to set some boundaries regarding what you want/need. A night or two a week to lie in piece without being guilt tripped or groped is not asking too much at all, so make that clear to him.

Next time you are not in the mood, tell him that you don't feel like it. Then if he keeps groping you, tell him again and tell him firmly. He needs to learn that sex is about both of you not just him, and the only way that will happen is if you too realise that and stop giving in to sex you really don't want. Because trust me, over time that will do more damage to your sex drive than anything else.

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A male reader, Sageoldguy1465 United States +, writes (30 July 2015):

Sageoldguy1465 agony auntWhen a guy with whom a woman is sexually active sez: "...this relationship isn't just about sex..." It is......

Good luck....

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