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My fiance admitted to cheating when we first started dating but now I found out he also lied about his ex... How do I get over this?

Tagged as: The ex-factor, Three is a crowd, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (13 June 2008) 1 Answers - (Newest, 13 June 2008)
A female United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

My fiancee admitted to cheating on me once with someone he met over the internet once when we first started dating. I was dealing with this and had almost otten over it but then found out that when we first started dating he said he hadnt had sex for 3 months and he had lied and had slept with his ex that he had dated for 2 years a week before we got together (he thought they were going to get back together- it wasnt a oops thing), then he saw her 2 weeks after we got together and almost kissed her. He's been absolutly perfect since then and we are expecting a child, he said that he told me because he didnt want me to find out later and freak out. Everytime I start to trust him again I find out he lied about something else in the past. How do I get over this?

View related questions: fiance, get back together, his ex, the internet

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A female reader, lotus mama808 United States +, writes (13 June 2008):

lotus mama808 agony auntHm.. How DO you get over this??? They offer counciling for couples, you could drill him every day, and try to squeeze the truth out of him. You could lower your self esteem and just let it be.....in the meantime, try to balance motherhood with this guy who has nothing but disrespect for you. (They dont go together very well) How you get over it is entirely up to you. You grew up with certain morals, standards and values, and now is the time to use them! Not just for you, but your baby too. As for me, I choose not to waste my precious time on this planet wondering if some guy is being faithful and respectful to me. Absolutely absurd. I refuse to let some guy steal the attention I have for my kids (unless it's for posative purposes;-) ). It's up to you. Remember, you're deciding for 2 now, not just yourself. I wonder what will happen when he gets another girl knocked up? How will you get over that? Good luck sweetie, and congrads on your precious little one. Once you look into his/her eyes, you'll see that nothing else matters. They are truly a blessing!

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