A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have slight fetishes for stubble, really tan skin, and um...big hands. The trouble is that if I see a guy with one or all, I can't stop gawking! It's so embarassing! My friends make fun of me sometimes because they say I like old cavemen. I can't help it, I like facial hair. I like really masculine guys. Not to say I like body-builders but when theres a guy who looks "tough" and is smart, educated- I start crushing. I can never talk to them though! I get tongue-tied and start stuttering! Embarassing! If I can talk to a guy, it's because I'm not attracted. I'm singe because my feelings scare me. These fetishes have gotten so bad that I had a mini-orgasm when a guy with a stubbled face sat down beside me at a gathering. No one noticed but aaargh! He was middle-eastern and smart and I couldn't speak. I'm scared! I don't ever want to be a girl who'll be with someone just because I'm physically attracted. When I'm ready to date, I want to admire a man for his values. How do I get over this? Please help?
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male
reader, turbine  +, writes (7 November 2010):
I think your fetish is harmless. You like men with stubble, tanned and strong that's okay. There are men like that for you. God has made a man for you and you must be with someone with whom you like and turns you on. Your fetish must be fed by you yourself. It would be better if you get a man of your dreams and have good sex with him rather than be with someone who whouldn't satisfy your fetish.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2010): Hey! :)
Yes, these are simple things you are just attracted to and in all honesty I think they are great and rather common and will help you find a guy when you go looking for one to date both for his physical and mental qualities. NEVER be with a guy just cause youre physically attracted as relationships base don that often found apart cause for the long term it depends on who are you as people if you wish to stay together. Mind first, body second. You seem to have a good line of sight so keep following that and you'll find your right place. Best to you doll :)
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (11 October 2010):
 I don't think you can classify this as a fetish, as much as it is simply what you are attracted to? But who knows exactly where that line goes. Your likes are not at all uncommon though, just to let you know. I love men with some facial hair too, and big hands are a must. We are more or less genetically tuned in to prefer certain things, and the man you describe as being attracted too typically is a hard working man who is brave and strong. Now, who wouldn't like that?
Anyway, if it has gotten to a point where it is embarrassing and you can't keep your focus, there's a problem. What keeps you from controlling yourself? Is it one of those times where you know you shouldn't look, but can't stop? Typically what you need to do then is practice self control. You can do it. You just have to be stern with yourself.
Maybe it will help if you imagine these men with some qualities you don't like at all. Example, imagine that they have a girlfriend, or if you need something more extreme, imagine that they might be a woman beater. If you can do that at least you will take your time to get to know them first.
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A
female
reader, petina1  +, writes (11 October 2010):
 It is one of the first things that do get people together, the way they look. You like that type that's all. I don't like men with beards and have never been out with one, or moustaches. Thats just me. You have to have some idea of what attracts and you have very strong opinions in that. If you do find someone else other than that who's personality you like, you can always ask them to not shave. We all like different types so don't worry too much about it. Good luck to the bloke you do land with all these attributes.
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