A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:my girlfriend and i had a strong relationship. There way she loved me i could tell that she is the perfect bride for the perfect groom. a year back she was raped,and sadly she got pregnant. From that day of the incident i never heard from her,she vanished into thin air,at first i didnt understand y would she do that bt rumours had it that she was raped.I tried all means to get hold of her bt i couldnt since she changed her contact numbers and vacated from wher she lived,i gaveup on her and moved on with my life and i got another girlfriend.Two weeks back my x showed up out of the blues,she tells me that after the rape she didnt knw hw and what to say to me thats y she decided to relocate because she was to ashamed.now she claims to love me she says she alwayz loved me,with her she brought a baby boy since she got preg.Guys i dont know what to do since i have my girlfriend whom i love,what and how do i say to my x since she cries begging me to love her back because she has always loved me...helpThanks Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (26 March 2013):
 you say to her you are sorry she's ready now but because she disappeared after her rape you had no choice but to move on.
If she truly loves you she will want you happy and will let you go....
if she can't accept it, then change your number and block her from your life. it sounds cruel but it's reality.
suggest to the ex that she gets some therapy to work on her issues.
IF god forbid I was raped the first and only person I would want to be with emotionally is my husband. He would be the first person I would go to.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2013): If you truly have moved on and have made yourself a new life to live, not only with another woman, but in general, then you need to make it very clear to her of all of this.
You're either happy with your new found life, or you're still holding onto the past. It's too little too late, and like you, she'll have to move on, too. Unless you decide to make the drastic change to go back to her and leave everything you've worked hard to achieve behind.
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