A
male
age
36-40,
*arm
writes:I broke up with my 4-year GF for good. We'd had complicated problems for a year (she is a liar). I cut her off completely after the talk, she chased after, and i got in my car and left. She called a few times. Left a message. A few weeks passed and she either called or emailed about once a week; i never replied. It's been a month now and she emailed me. She's either leaving or going on a trip and wrote "come with me"--that was a week ago. I have been ignoring her still with no contact. I have had no problems ignoring her until now--i feel like i'm cracking up. I wonder about her, etc., and I feel bad ignoring her. What should I do?
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female
reader, Hard_decision  +, writes (22 March 2010):
Im the same - I know my ex and I will never work out because I simply cannot trust someone who cheated on me and a baby was made because of that. I dont want to ever get back with him, yet I still look out for emails from him etc... I dont reply to them, and I cant explain why I look out for them, but I do. I guess its a feeling that you wanna know they still love you, even though it doesnt matter anymore. I dont care as much and thats because time has slowly but surely helped make things easier as each day passes. Hang in there - 2 months from now you'll look back and be amazed at how strong you have become and how less you think of her.
A
female
reader, Entirely Unique  +, writes (22 March 2010):
 You can't really stop it, all you can do is try your best to ignore it and find other things to distract you while you're going through it.
It will get better and you won't hope as much as time goes on.
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A
male
reader, Garm +, writes (22 March 2010):
Garm is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI've already been through the MANY stages of hoping/believing that our relationship can improve. It won't; she's incapable.
But why do I hope she'll call? How do I stop this silliness?
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A
female
reader, Hard_decision +, writes (22 March 2010):
My ex is the same - dated for 3 years, he did nothing but lie to me and cheated on me. I cut him outta my life a week ago (changed my phone number) He has now started emailing me, leaving notes in my mail box - saw me at the shopping centre and pulled me up to talk... I too feel bad for ignoring him, it breaks my heart because I still love him.. But people who are compulsive liars dont change overnight.. it takes years for them to change. Dont feel bad - your protecting yourself from any more hurt. Keep strong - Im finding it hard myself but we will get there.
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A
female
reader, Entirely Unique +, writes (22 March 2010):
Its natural to have a lapse in ignoring her, as the time goes on and the pain of being lied to isn't as prominent you will find that you'll see different things when she contacts you and/or you think of her compared to the big 'liar' sign you have been seeing.
You have nothing to feel bad about, she lied to you, you ended the relationship as most people would when they're lied to and you've cut contact, which personally I think is the best thing to do at the end of a relationship at least until you give enough time to pass for the people involved to heal
But in a situation like someone lied to you theres not really anywhere you can go with this, however they are in your life they will always be that person and you have to work out whether you really want someone like that in your life.
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