A
female
age
36-40,
*razycat27
writes:I'm falling for a mate of mine , we both flir with each other a fair bit and like to have a joke around .. Thing is I've just found out from another collegue that he's got a girlfriend , but thing is hes still really flirty and continues to be really nice towards me .. When she asked him she didn't tell him who wanted to know , so I'm not entirely sure if he knew it was me .. Thing is I can't get him out of my head , I try avoiding him cos I want these feelings to go away cos I can't act upon then cos of his relationship status ..it's doing my head in cos when I try not to see him he's there .. He throws his rubbish at me and says it not him and he knows I'm single so he's like oh hey look it's ur boyfriend About guys who aren't .. He's always looking for my attention , like he walks past and repeats my name and talks dirty to me and is like so when ya coming to work for me ? ( but not that kind of work ) when he walks past he whistles and in the meetings he sits across and starts talking to the person next to him and says stuff about me like hav u met Catherine and stuff like that .. I don't know what to do , I know I can't persue anything but I can't get him out of my head !!! Please help
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2011): It sounds like he is too full on and really does need to tone things down, I think it's important you set your boundaries quickly and casually and this will all stop from his end - giving you the breathing space you need. Some guys just deal with attractive girls in this way and have no intention of 'hooking' up with them. It's there way of sort of being brotherly but not being brotherly.
The next time he does it I would say loudly but in a friendly way "Hey that's a bit full on mate!, tone it down buddy!" He should get the message straight away and if he doesn't just keep repeating this phrase and he will eventually get the idea to tone it down, without being offended.
If he asks you about it you can always explain that you don't really like public attention and appreciate it when he is quieter.
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