A
female
age
18-21,
chelychel
writes:My boyfriend has had feelings for his old high school friend/my friend for the last 5 years. We've talked a lot about this situation, and the conclusion is always, I'm crazy and he doesn't know how to get rid of these feelings. I really don't think its crazy to be upset that my boyfriend of 10 months has intense feelings for another woman, be it our friend or not. Recently I was feeling much better about myself and this situation, however, I found a picture of this girl in a swimsuit in his documents folder. I was irate when this happened, and he thought it was no big deal, it was just a hot picture. I need to know if I'm over-reacting and crazy, or if this is as big a problem as a think it is. Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Danielepew  + ♥, writes (5 May 2008):
 You're not over-reacting. He has an attachment that should be gone by now.
I'm with Mrs. Bear. He should concentrate on you. Otherwise, you should have reasons to worry where you really stand with him.
A
female
reader, Kimaxsi +, writes (5 May 2008):
He's not over this other girl, so he honestly should not have entered into a relationship with you or anyone till he dealt with these feelings. I do not think you are over-reacting, compared to me I'd say you were under-reacting. Talk to him, tell him how it makes you feel and that things have to change because they cannot go on this way any longer. Take some time apart, for you to think about what you want to do and for him to decide what he wants to do about this relationship. I am not trying to hurt you but it may be he's only with you to be closer to her and if that's the case end it immediately. You deserve better than this love, you deserve someone whose in the relationship as much as you, and he's just not in it.
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A
female
reader, MRS BEAR  +, writes (5 May 2008):
 This guy needs a reality check! he is completely out of order and I don't know any woman who would put up with this behaviour? She obviously does not feel the same way about him otherwise they would be together?? What would he do if she 'came on to him' would be recepricate?? I think he is being terribly unfair and his actions are really affecting how you feel about yourself. I don't think he is likely to change any time soon? You are not over-reacting at all. I personally would give him an ultimatum, he has to get rid of the photos, stop talking about this woman and concentrate on you!! Otherwise i don't see a future, or a happy one for you at that.
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