A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I came across this site and I hope I can get some help. I am in an open relationship and I don't know if I can handle it anymore. I agreed to this 11 months ago but now the emotion and love I have is much stronger. I moved with my gf to another state and I am all alone. All she cares about is meeting new people and finding people to have sex with. Now what? I feel so trapped. I have no strength to leave because I am so weak from this whole thing. It has been ripping me up inside. I'm pretty sure I will get responses about just leaving but it isnt that simple. She says she loves me and I know I love her. Why am I not good enough to love? Why is some random person more important than someone that has given you everything from the bottom of there heart? How do you believe they just want sex with someone else and they wont leave or want to be with the other person? Why is nothing discussed until it is going to happen instead of when you put up a personals ad? The answers i get is "you arent my mother and you wont control my life". Which to me is real funny since I am pretty sure I am the one being controlled. Please someone help. I really need a friend or someone to talk to.
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 September 2008): I feel sympathy for you, but at the same time, impatience. You're hanging on to an abusive relationship..she doesn't Truly love you. She's very 'messed' up in her thinking to believe it's o.k. to have sex with stangers...(let's not forget STD's, AIDS...) I sense low self esteem, but I understand how she could bring any man down to this depression. Your love should be given to a girl that only wants YOU, doesn't that sound enticing? Is there any way to give yourself space from her??? Only then can you 'clear your head' to see this for What It Is. Read the 'swinger' section on this site...there's alot of jealousy and mistrust...if you don't have trust, you have nothing.
Take Care and saying a prayer for you today.
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (28 September 2008):
If she is accusing you of controlling her then it sounds like you aren't talking in the right way to each other.
Try talking to her about how you are feeling but don't tell her to stop or change, just tell her that you are feeling lonely and unhappy.
She could help you to go out and make new friends or do anything like that to improve your lot in life.
Don't ask her to change, ask her to help you change. It may not be that if you get friends and self confidence that your relationship will improve, but you will be in a better place to improve it.
Good Luck!! xx
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