A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:We are married 20 years. My wife was very sexual before we dated and after, she is a high sex person and very good at it. She shared with me that she wants to try a MMF Threesome. She knows I'm straight as an arrow. The other guy would most likely be an escort or something as I want to keep this as professional and secure as possible. She said to see if she would like it we could have just me having sex with her and she will only blow the guy,while I'm doing everything else at the same time. She has even mentioned three guys at once in the future if this works out. How do I make this happen professionally and can it damage a secure marriage like ours? Lastly it's easy to find female escorts,is there a male escort service with straight men.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2021): It's almost everyone's fantasy, a 3 way. Guys dream of 2 girls, we dream of 2 nice guys. It's a litte weird she's thinking of 3 guys. I picture that and it's gross. Something to consider. In college my boyfriend and his roommate had me, it wasn't a 3 way -- they just took turns. I thought it was wild. But a week later he broke up with me.
I think you should try couples therapy first.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2021): Hi
Some people take a third person into their marriage because their partner cannot physically have sex, and this is a personal agreement and can actually save a marriage if all are in agreement. It's not always an evil deed, it can be a practical need, and this does not devalue a person or their relationship. Some people are able to separate sex from love and some people see love as spiritual joining tantric sex and sex simply a physical bit of fun. We are all different and have different needs and desires.
I won't say it cheapens or devalues her as a person (everyone has value and nobody is cheap, just lost) and really it's not about sex (a physical act) it just highlights that something is lacking in the self, needing outside fantasy to try and fill a void.
I personally don't think it can help your marriage and it could lead to disaster, something is missing inside your wife,( let's hope it's not the window cleaner) to only search for physical satisfaction.
You also need to do some soul searching.
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A
male
reader, kenny  + ♥, writes (8 February 2021):
 Like the other aunts have highlighted, I agree that going ahead with this fantasy will lead to complications in your relationship.
It kind of an excuse to be unfaithful, but the only difference is that your there to see it.
I like the way your wife is specifying that she want's to do it with only men. Would she still be ok with this if you wanted to get a few hot chicks round for you to have sex with?.
Not sure about where you are, but i'm sure COVID restrictions will be preventing escort workers from even working.
I would just keep this as a fantasy, and not run the risk of ruining your marriage.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2021): Seriously?!! You came to this site to use uncles and aunts like pimps to advise you on how to find participants for threesomes and group-sex with your wife??? That's not our function here, my dear sir!!!
You run the risk of robbery, identity-theft, sexually-transmitted diseases, and your wife running off with some random-guy. Ultimately a divorce!
This is a pretty common post submitted to DC. We must receive one at least once or twice a month. A married-individual asking if they should consider having outsiders intrude on their love-life? This is a switch! You want to know where you can find man-hoes?
Ponder on the following questions and then you decide:
(1) How long before you get jealous of guys who are more endowed than you are? I don't care how well-endowed you are, somebody is always bigger! Don't say size doesn't matter. If you're paying for it, who wants to pay for a cocktail frank vs. a kielbasa?
(2) There is the possibility she will get attached to someone more adept at lovemaking than yourself...then what?
(3) Chances are, or inevitably, she will run into someone she grows fond of, or attached to; and might be compelled to have their own little secret rendezvous. What will be your reaction upon discovery?
(4) Are you given to violence? Are you temperamental, or do you have a short fuse?
(5) Will your wife be okay if the answer is no? Will she simply just go behind your back and have an affair if you refuse?
Are you really the one who wants to include another guy, and claiming it's what your wife wants? If you're straight as an arrow, I find it hard to believe you'd want to be in close proximity of another naked-guy in your bed!
It WILL ruin your marriage! I think your marriage is already in trouble. Your *wife* wants to have sex with other men! Worse, in your face!
Not sure why you came to DC to ask such questions? Maybe marriage counseling might prove more beneficial to your marriage.
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious + ♥, writes (7 February 2021):
 Fantasy is one thing but, once you step over that line and enter reality, things change - because you no longer have any control over what happens. In your fantasies you can envisage anything you want and keep complete control. Once you start involving third parties in your relationship, feelings get involved and things can easily spiral out of control.
This site has had many many posts over the years of situations like this going badly wrong and ruining what previously appeared to be strong stable relationships. I would advise trying to come up with new things in your relationship which don't involve a third party. Explore each other fantasies. I am sure you can come up with something which will add excitement without adding danger.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 February 2021): OMG OP!!!!! Bored much during the PANDEMIC??? Big risks during COVID by the way. Had to mention that.I just don't get people who are MARRIED and want to fuck others at the same time! What is even worse is having the ability to go through with it. It is totally foreign to me how a man or woman who LOVES their spouse can watch their spouse fuck or suck someone in front of them. I wouldn't, couldn't do that. NO WAY. You would think there would be some level of jealousy or possessiveness. Surely watching your spouse doing that would RUIN your trust in them. It would lower their value in your eyes. You would start to feel resentment and insecurity at some point and wonder if you will ever be enough. Or whether they will do things behind your back. I mean, what does it say about your wife's perception of your sexual skills if your wife needs MORE MEN in the bedroom? Are you not good enough? Doesn't that STING you at ALL? What kind of a woman wants to tear apart her man's sexual ego by introducing other men in the bedroom? That is beyond me. Sex is between two people. It is the most INTIMATE act there is. Sex is about the bond and connection between two people, not about how many people you can bang at the same time. You have both got it all wrong. YES, of course this will affect your marriage. RUIN IT in fact. Keep playing with fire, OP and you will get burned. Watch out.You have yourself an OVER SEXED wife. She is good in bed? Soooooo? I am good in bed too, OP. But I do not need to live out some fantasy to boost my own ego to prove it. There are millions of women who are good in bed but not all of us need or demand threesomes. If all she cares about is her sexual prowess and proving herself to be so good in bed, you are going to be fighting a never ending battle you can never win. Nothing will be good enough. Where will you draw the line? Open this can of worms and it will take on a snowball effect and you will not be able to tame the monster you have created. You are deluding yourself into giving into all her perverted desires to keep her. Hmmmm. If this is what you need to do to keep her happy, my suggestion is she's not worth it. What about if she decides she wants to sample some guy behind your back or loves blowing him and wants to do more with him? You can never predict what will happen in the moment, in real life. IT RARELY PLAYS OUT LIKE THE FANTASY IN YOUR HEAD. How do you know OP that the guy might like her and want to penetrate her? What are you going to do if she succumbs to his advances in the heat of the moment? Feel like a third wheel?I do not get people like you who want to risk their entire marriage on a meaningless, fleeting moment that does nothing but damage your relationship permanently. Why are people not getting this by now???
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