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I' lost interest in sex with my wife after the baby was born...

Tagged as: Marriage problems, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (5 September 2005) 2 Answers - (Newest, 6 September 2005)
A male , anonymous writes:

After my wife had a baby, I don't want to have sex with her. I don't know why.

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A reader, Rebecca Batchelor +, writes (6 September 2005):

Rebecca Batchelor agony auntPerhaps it is because your perception of her has changed from a sensual and exciting woman to a mother who has responsibilities. Don't worry too much, many men do go through this. Some men find their partners more beautiful when they are pregnant and after the birth while others find them not as sexually attractive as before as they recognise they have to nurture the baby.

You are probably feeling tired too like your wife and a couples sex life can dwindle a little after the birth of a child.

Give it a bit of time and you may find your libido will naturally restore itself.

Try and find some time alone with your wife; get a babysitter, buy her a beautiful dress and spend some quality time together.

Try to look at this as a temporary problem; your wife is still the same attractive woman, only your perception of her has changed.

Try to spend time together without the baby; make sure you are able to do this every week to try to restore your sex life.

Good luck.

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A female reader, xxxsoulsistaxxx United Kingdom +, writes (6 September 2005):

xxxsoulsistaxxx agony auntMany things change when a baby come along and with all that joy, they can bring their fair share of problems! There are a few reasons why you may be feeling differently about your wife sexually. Maybe her appearance has changed a lot throughout the pregnancy and you don't find her as physically attractive as you did before? The relationship itself changes after a baby too, maybe you think of her differently now, not just as your wife, she's now also the mother of your baby? Or maybe you're both just too tired since the tot came along and need some rest and some quality time together to get things back on track. Make sure you take some time out for just you two. I know this can be hard after a baby but please try. It may help get things back to normal and you can start making more babies! Good luck, I hope my suggestions have been of use and if things don't improve, maybe see a counsellor. :)

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