A
female
age
41-50,
*ad Girl Reyes
writes:I love two wonderful men that love but one is married and he always says that he wants to be with me, but it is so hard to forget him. i find myself always going back to the spot with him on the other hand i live with a wonderful person. he loves and always tells me he is here for me, but i can't love him back. i care alot about him and i tell myself that i will learn to love him, but will i. I never wanted to fall in love with a married man cause i know that he will never leave but i did and now it is hard. i can't tell my boyfriend about it cause i don't want to make him feel bad. But there is something missing between us and i don't know what it is. i hope you can help me. Lost in Love.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, empty-1 +, writes (15 October 2009):
You cannot simultaneously be in love with someone and help them cheat!This married man took a solemn oath, one that he meant with all his heart when he took it. He gathered friends, family, and all sundry to witness him take that oath before an official of either church or state.In entering into a marriage, he voluntarily gave a portion of his identity over to the new identity as part of a married couple.By helping him cheat on the other half of that new identity, you are shitting all over that new identity.Guess what!? You disrespect the wife, you disrespect the marriage, that NECESSARILY means you are at the same time disrespecting the husband! You cannot possible be in love with someone you are willing to treat with such profound and thoughtless disrespect!
A
female
reader, AuntyEm  +, writes (15 October 2009):
 ...Oh and I meant to say...the something missing??? well that would be your honesty and fidelity!!
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (15 October 2009):
Grrr messy messy messy. All I can say is you reap what you sow...and whatever happens, someone's going to get hurt and it will probably be you.
Leave the married guy alone (force yourself) and as for your BF, well I think it's time you appreciated him and showed some loyalty. If you ever get found out, lord knows how it will all end.
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A
female
reader, puds123  +, writes (15 October 2009):
I personnally think what your doing is awful. Not only are you lying to your bf your also ruining the wifes relationship. I think you should come clean with your bf, if you dont love him then you shouldnt waste his time by cheating on him its just not fair!! let him find someone who is willing to be at least faithful to him. I honestly think you should tell your bf and go fromthere. Married man hardly ever leave their wives for someone else.
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