A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey I know that this has nothing to do with dating or relationships but I decided to ask it here anyway cause I really need some advice.I am a 20 year old college student who is recovering from a year long bout of major depression. This depression has effected everything about me, my grades, my body, my weight (I gained a lot of weight), my habits...basically everything. I am currently recieving treatment for it through meds and therapy and I am slowly getting back to myself.When I first entered college I was a biology major taking the premed courses to work towards med school. My depression started shortly after the school year and I did not do so great in the two prerequisite courses. As a result I changed my major and was told to forget about med school and becomming a doctor so for awhile I did.Now that I am recieving treatment, my motivated outlook on life has returned and I am feeling much better. I approached my advisor and told her that I wanted to try for med school again and and she told me I have to let go of my dream....just forget about it....things happen and doing poorly in basic classes tells you that you cannot handle it. (I am thinking true, true it does tell you you can't handle it but I was sick for my entire college career so far.) Besides I did not do that bad, my GPA is a 3.0 and I am only in the beginnig of my college career. I can bring up the GPA and retake the classes and I hardly started the journey. How dare she tell me this!!This entire week I can't stop thinking about whether or not I will be able to do the prerequisites. I think I can't now and it is really bothering me. I need more confidence. If it was not meant for me why do I want to do it so badly and why do I have such a strong desire to become a doctor. Maybe it is because it is what I wanted to do ever since I was little. I am smart, in high school I graduated in the top 10 percent of my class and scored high on standardized tests. I work really hard too, that was when i was not suffering from depression.Should I try or am I in denial? I really do not know.Thank you for reading this, and I appreciate any comments.=)
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female
reader, Dreamerconquerer  +, writes (18 September 2009):
Well may be it is too late to reply now, but you never know. I just want to let you know, that people most likely give advice or talk to others based on their own experience, fears, and successes. Probably your advisor, even though is an "advisor" is not a secure and successful person. She might discourage you either because she hasn't really pursue her dreams, or has been stopped many times, and feels she is actually protecting you... or, she has issues that makes her feel envious of others who really are trying to pursue their dreams (because maybe she has not pursue hers) and wants to put you down so she can feel better.
I do not think you should stop pursuing med school. You definitely have a good GPA and since you have only started school you still have a long way before medical school to bring it up.
Even if you were in a worse position, I would always suggest at least trying, especially since this is a lifelong dream for you.
Remember that only those who at least try pursuing their dreams can actually succeed. You can't let anyone decide your life for you... if you have an opportunity in your life take advantage, since many others don't even have the opportunity to go to school, be educated, and you do, so do what you love.
Many people were put down while trying to pursue their dreams, ex: Shakira (she was told when she started pursuing her dream of being a singer that she couldn't sing -independently of whether you agree with that or not- she followed her dream no matter what and now she is super rich, and does what she loves. Leona Lewis was totally unknown to the world, and motivated by her own belief of having talent decided to take singing classes, and ended up winning the X-factor in the UK and is now a world-known singer and making success. I mean there are plenty of examples, and it is up to you to let others put you down, or keep pursuing your dreams.
You might not always get what you want, but at least you can't never say that you have failed if you really try. But if plus having a dream you have the ingredients to be what you want, then success is really the outcome. Remember you have what it takes, you have a dream, you are a good student, you work hard, and you really love medicine.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2008): I did a Google search for "do I have what it takes to become a doctor," hoping to find direction for my own life, and this is what showed up.I am a college freshman, also pre-med and battling depression. All my life I have dreamed of being a doctor, yet recently I began to doubt myself. Reading your post, I felt angered by your advisor's "help," but it gave me clarity in what I need to do in my life.I think we both need to regather ourselves and keep on trying. There is a reason why you've always wanted to be a doctor. There's a reason why you were outraged by your advisor's response. There's a reason you can't just give up on this--and it's because you really are meant to pursue this. If you didn't have what it takes, you would've accepted that fact and moved on a long, long time ago. But because you are unable to abandon this dream, it shows that it's more than just a dream--it's your calling. And you must follow through.It's going to be a challenged, but what doesn't offer a challenge?You're academic history shows that you're smart, but you need more than good grades to survive med school. Thinking about all you've had to overcome this past year, it's clear that you're a very strong individual. You're determined and a hard worker. Depression can throw everything out of synch, but if through it all your desire to be a doctor has remained, than doesn't that just make it more obvious that you need to do this? This is important to you, and you must keep at it. Don't settle; it's your life and only you know what you're capable of.I have full faith that you will get through this all. Depression sucks, but have faith in yourself, trust your instincts and don't lose sight of your aspirations.Here's to biology majors, chemistry labs, mcats and scrubs! We've got a long journey ahead of us, but I think we both know what we need to do. Good luck, doctor.
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A
female
reader, korculan queen  +, writes (17 February 2008):
Hi first of all I would say that the best advise is to not let other people's perception of your worth affect you. Have you heard of the circle of influence? Draw a big circle on a piece of paper. This is your inner circle of influence ie how you think how you respond to situations. Then draw a smaller circle next to this big circle and this is the external circle of influence ie how others treat you and how others perceive you and how others react to your thoughts and beliefs. Now think which of the circles or situations is in your control and which of these circles can you change? That is correct the inner circle of influence is the one you can change. You can not change other peoples perceptions and views towards you but you can change HOW YOU REACT TO THIS EXTERNAL STIMULI through your circle of influence. Can you take time off from your studies and say travel or do volontary work in this field and get some skills together and then go back refreshed and go back to med school? You are just what your country needs in that you have wanted to be a doctor since you were little. Have you thought about doing med school in another country say Australia? We are crying out for doctors here and you will get such good experience here with the indigenous population and the melting pot of just about every culture on the planet in the one country. Just a thought but hey dare to dream. Follow your heart and your dreams will follow. Good luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2008): Hi, You need to go for it - dont let go of your dream until it is out of reach! Your grades are good enough to make it, if you want it. Dont let anyone tell you any different. Its sad that the person is not supporting you - how are you ment to have confidence in yourself?! Pick yourself up, go it alone if you must, work hard and reap the rewards.
Your not dreaming, just ambitious and thats great, too many people out there are happy to sit on benefits and work towards bugger all.
Keep smiling x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2008): Hey,
Please do not let ANYONE take your dreams away from you, not even your advisor. Please have some faith in yourself. You have to believe that you can do it. Confide in a friend or relative who believes in you and start working towards your goals. Take the classes that you need to take and dedicate a lot of quality time ensuring that you excel in them.
Please don't give up! I am a final year student in Law school and it took me a while to get here - but guess what I did. I believed in myself, I had persons who believed in me and most importantly, I put all my trust, my goals and aspirations in GOD.
I don't know if you are religious - just try and believe in yourself and think positive thoughts. Believe that you can achieve it and work toward achieving it and you will.
All the best and please don't ever give up.
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A
male
reader, Zim  +, writes (17 February 2008):
 Honestly, I think you should try. Does your advisor know about the depression you had? Even if she does, I think it would be best to make sure you're at your best before you go back to try again. When you go again, go in there with your head held high, explain your situation and state how much this means to you and how long you've been trying for this. Remember, state, don't plead. However, do it politely.:-)
I'm from the UK so I don't understand your scores but if they're good enough, then go for it with all your heart, but only when your back to your old self.
I hope that helps. Please let us know if there's anything more we can do.
ZIM
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