A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Just found out my ex-girlfriend is dating someone else, whom I know. This is bothering me more than it should. How do I get over this?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2008): I'm same story different girl. I was 23, she was 21. I was so devastated by the breakup it took me two months just to remember how much we were fighting the last month of our 25 month relationship. I couldn't see any problems at the time cause I cared so much about her, but man did we have problems. Nothing major, but once it combined with the fact we were both in transitional points in our lives, game over. She moved on after 3 weeks to a guy I know. It hurt, but you can't blame them. She is at a point where she wants freedom, I'm at a point where I need to get my life figured out. Pain subsides with understanding, but until then, soccer (my first love) and the gym are the best cures.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks, i've been hitting the gym and the soccerfield day and night, but completely avoiding her is out of the question since we both are in the same student orgs, so I wind up seeing her atleast once a week if not more.
I feel bad for you man, but it really helps to know I'm not alone. Thanks for the response
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 December 2008): Man, do I know exactly what your going through.. My girl friend and I dated for over two years, and the she decided she wasn't happy any longer. That was it, no fights, no cheating, nothing. I've learned though through a ton of research since this happened that women end relationships for one of two reasons; 1. not enough attention or 2. to much attention. On one hand she doesn't feel valued and on the other hand you are needy and desperate. Any way she started dating a friend of mine, not a close friend but a friend, only 5 weeks after we broke up. It hurts so bad! Makes you feel like your worthless or not important. I think about her when I wake up and dream about her when I sleep. I thought we were perfect for each other. But if you stop and reflect there has to be a difference in the person you are now and the person you were when you first met this girl. You have to figure out why you changed first, what caused it. After that you have to analyze the situation and decide if you even want her back. Remove her completely from your life before you make this decision. The fact is that she got a new relationship to help her get over YOU! Which means she's not over you, and 90% of rebounds dont work out. It may take a couple of months but she'll realize that this guy is so good and maybe you aren't so bad. People have a natural tendency to idolize over an extended period of time and remember the good times that you shared. That is why avoiding contact is important so she can miss you. After you have got your self in-order call her and ask her for lunch or something simple. Dont talk about the relationship or the other guy, just show her you are fine and attractive. Good luck man...I'll tell you I am currently working on getting my self right and plan on contacting my ex in another few weeks. Its already been about 6 weeks since I last talked to her, and she is in a relationship. The two biggest things that will help you here are the weight room and GOD. Focus on eating right and do what makes you the most happy in life!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2008): If there's one thing I've found out on this website its that there's alot of people going through similar experiences.
You'll only get over her when you meet someone else, not easy !!!,
but you'll wonder why you where with her in the first place when you will.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI guess you guys are right. I need to accept that this is over with. Even though she cheated on me, lied to me, etc, and my friends tell me to 'forget about her' and move on, i still think about her. I guess part of me was hanging on to the idea that maybe she might come back or somthing, which I know is stupid. I know it takes time to get over these things, I just hope, if finding somone else is the answer, that I get that person soon and get over this girl.
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A
female
reader, LittleHelper16 +, writes (20 November 2008):
 I suggest finding someone else. it will help you move on just like she has. it might take some time. and its normal to feel a little jealous, or to want her back or any feeling like that but you will feel better if you just let it go :)
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (20 November 2008):
 You get over this when you understand that it is over, and that it means you have a chance to find someone new.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the advice, I'll try my best. One major problem is this was my first real relationship, and she cheated on me after a year and a couple months. Though its been a little over a month now, I still think about her all the time, and learning this tears me up.I just want to get her out of my mind for good. I don't know how nice I should be since she did cheat on me, but i'll work on it. This fucking sucks
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A
female
reader, Teacake +, writes (20 November 2008):
 If you loved her it is natural to be ripped up inside. No matter how old you get, seeing the one you love and lost with someone else is never easy. But you will meet someone new and no doubt forget about whatsherface.
Just say hello when you see her and don't let her see or know how upset you are.
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