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female
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anonymous
writes: I have been recently chatting to my ex husband and we have spoken about meeting each other to possibly get back together. He cheated on me but I still love him and he has feelings for me. The only problem is that I'm married again with kids. I wouldn't exactly say I am happily married coz I'm paranoid and suspect my new husband is looking for love elsewhere. What should I do? I think about my ex every day and when I have sex he's on my mind.
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cheated on me, get back together, my ex Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Lostandalone  +, writes (28 June 2006):
 Well only a small minded person could even could read all that I said and only come up with that response. No, wouldn't scream at you thats not me and I'm alone because I choose to be. I'm lost because I'm still discovering things about myself so aren't we all truly lost and finding yourself is a life long journey. Why I would waste this time and space to enlighten you is beyond me. Don't be anonymous and have enough gall to get your own column and send ME an e-mail. Anyway get a grip and leave men alone. You might be bi and just don't know it. Judge a woman because you missed a lesson yourself.
A
male
reader, Lostandalone +, writes (28 June 2006):
Well only a small minded person could even could read all that I said and only come up with that response. No, wouldn't scream at you thats not me and I'm alone because I choose to be. I'm lost because I'm still discovering things about myself so aren't we all truly lost and finding yourself is a life long journey. Why I would waste this time and space to enlighten you is beyond me. Don't be anonymous and have enough gall to get your own column and send ME an e-mail. Anyway get a grip and leave men alone. You might be bi and just don't know it. Judge a woman because you missed a lesson yourself.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 June 2006): Lostandalone, what are you going on about? She was considering leaving her current and safe marriage for the Ex. Yes, it was not right for her to even consider going back to the ex (leopards don't change their spots). But for you only a man could have answered like that, I can hear your words screaming at me. So, you are an EX CHEATER why doesn't that surprise me. No wonder you are LOST AND ALONE Mr Lostandalone.
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A
male
reader, Lostandalone +, writes (27 June 2006):
I was reading the responses to this question and 1 anon asked "Gee what is wrong with us women?" Well, for one you think people can't change. Does this mean that you haven't changed over years time? I think that is a stupid statement and should only be referred in the case of YOUR EX, he might not have changed and he might still be a dog of some sorts but don't label everyone who cheats as a permanent cheater.
Now in this case, I can't respect anyone who doesn't respect the sanctity of marriage, that means you and him. If you're not happy then leave and pursue a relationship with this man when you feel comfortable. Confront your current husband. There is no reason to let this thing drag on and on. All you will accomplish is making everyone involved miserable and that includes your children.
And coming from an ex-cheater. People do change and for you backward women who think like this you have a right to your OPINION but don't push this OPINION on other people because thats just what it is. You have no grounds to label or judge anyone unless you are mistake and sin free. If you are stand up and be recognized because the only person to accomplish that died on a cross.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (27 June 2006):
 You need a reality check here. You are married with children. Sorry but husband and children first. The ex should stay ex, you are better off anyway since he's a cheater and obviously has no respect for marriage since he's sniffing around a married woman. Start making sure your new husband has absolutely no reason for looking for love anywhere else but your arms. You won't regret it. Get busy and good luck.
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A
male
reader, Dr. Reality Check  +, writes (27 June 2006):
 Wow, your head must be spinning right now. The bottom line is that we always think the best of people in their absence. The reality is that you weren't able to work it out with your before, and you are totally kidding yourself and him if you are thinking it could work a second time around. My advice would be to work at your current relationship as opposed to just running when it gets tough.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2006): What a mess! It did not work out with your ex, what makes you think It will work out now. You are only kidding yourself. Work at the marriage you have now, you still love your husband don't you and he has not cheated on you.Leave the past in the past and tell your ex to move on with his life. Think about your children and stop dreaming of what you assume your ex could have been, he has not changed he will do it again given the opportunity. Gee, what is wrong with us women?
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