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Is writing an anonymous love letter a good way to test the waters?

Tagged as: Age differences, Dating, Gay relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (13 March 2011) 2 Answers - (Newest, 22 March 2011)
A male Brazil age 26-29, anonymous writes:

Is writing an anonymous love note a good way to approach my crush who is one year younger than I am? We stay really close everyday since we study in the same school. I can't live like I'm not going to die someday so I thought this idea was fun and effective, however, I confess that I don't know if I'm brave enough to do it and still doubting about this plan's effectiveness. I planned this thoroughly: I'll write him a love note telling how much I like him and how I don't want to stay invisible any more, also how I am afraid to reveal myself. I'll say that, indeed, I'm a vulnerable human and ask for a chance. However, I will persist on the mystery thing. At first, not revealing whether I am guy or girl. I'll scent the second letters and attach some chocolates too. I won't handwrite it, so he won't be able to ask our teachers whose handwriting this was. I will ask him not to make a confusion and to keep the secret, also I'll make it clear that I'm not a fake or he's friends making fun of him by saying that the letter is too serious and complex to be a prank. I'll count with a friend's help to find an effective way of "mailing", what a scam haha. While anonymously mailing him, I'll be approaching him as a friend and then see how things unfold...

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A male reader, georgey5100 United Kingdom +, writes (22 March 2011):

I like this idea :) it's so sweet! however a few things....

1) does he know you are gay/bi? ...if he does then this may be a clue to him as to who sent the letter(s)... if he doesn't you will probably give him a big shock that is if he doesnt have his suspicions that you are gay already.

2) do you even suspect that he is gay/bi? ...if he's straight... stay clear! very rarely does a gay guy manage to catch a straight guy! if he's definately gay then you will probably be fine... he'll give you a yes or no answer and probably spread gossip about you. If you are not sure maybe take more time to try and work it out.

3) Are you out of the closet at school? If not... worst scenario he could end up outing you

4) How good friends are you with him? If you have only recently become friends with him then you might want to leave it for a while longer. If you are extremely good friends then its worth considering that you may be putting your friendship on the line

But if you are still confident in writing the letters then go right ahead! :)

Suggestion... don't scent the letters... he will assume it is a woman (plus this is quite an old fashioned thing to do) and what do you mean by attatch chocolates? a box of them?

...oh and try and be with him when he opens the first letter (if you think you can manage to not give away the secret!)... if he likes it then this will help in making your decision to send another.

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A male reader, Remniscent Canada +, writes (14 March 2011):

I have no idea! I love this girl and I don't know if she likes me too, so I'm going to follow this question so I can get an answer too. Good luck.

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