A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:is there still hope for me?..i made a stupid commen mistake and i had sex on the 1st date and made it easy for him. i really like this guy but i don't know what to do.. most days he will call me and usually it's very rare if he doesn't call like today he didn't.. well anyways what i'm trying to say is that i made sex very easy for him and is there still hope for a relationship?.. even if i make sex a challenge from now on? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 May 2007): Well...i didn't like the last guys answer, i mean who does the guy have sex with so fast except for you? Is he a player to get you into bed as fast as possible and thereafter not call u anymore? I think it doesnt matter, if he likes you, he does if not, he probably didnt that much before either! hope you still hear from him! guys shouldnt go about girls as though they were sluttish and they themselves are just behaving normal and according to their drives when getting into bed on the first date.
A
female
reader, candy00s  +, writes (26 May 2007):
 arrange to go out and dont have sex, just see how things go.
get to know him better and let him get to know you.
Just do what feels right.
Dont keep rushing into the sexual side of the relationship
hope this helps
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A
female
reader, candy00s +, writes (26 May 2007):
No i dont think its too late!
Ring him and ask him out - arrange to go for a meal and have a chat. See how things go without having sex.
he might really like you and feel exactly the same as you are!
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A
male
reader, Yos  +, writes (25 May 2007):
 Oral sex is sex. (hence the word 'sex' in the name :)
Yes it's not quite so 'personal' as intercourse in some ways, but fundamentally it's doing the same thing.
If you are going to play 'hard to get' a bit then the big deal is orgasm. It's his sex drive that's compelling him: and orgasm is the 'reward' at the end. Essentially what you want to do is to turn him on but not give him the payoff (ie orgasm). So flirt a lot, kiss, touch (not genitals), and tease! The more turned on you can get him without taking his pants off the more he'll desire you. The longer you can keep that going the more likely it is that he'll really start to fall for you.
Sorry if all that sounds very cynical, but it's just how (most) mens' sex drives work. We're really pretty simple when it comes down to it.
I guess that sounds like I'm saying don't have sex at all. That's probably not realistic :) (plus you want some too), but try to keep him guessing and on his toes. Mystery, romance, suggestion, all these things are ingredients in the recipe for love.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 May 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks and also should i replace regular sex with oral sex instead..?
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A
male
reader, Yos +, writes (25 May 2007):
You'll have to wait and see how he reacts. There are so many other factors than when you first have sex when it comes to relationships getting started.
Having said that, having sex very quickly with a guy can turn him off you. If it looks like it's created a problem you could try talking to him about it, tell him it was very out of character for you. You might also want to consider backing off a little and making him work harder for a while.
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A
male
reader, Slimsam  +, writes (25 May 2007):
I dont think all is lost but again it depends with the guys personality.
I mean if he is up for a relationship or not.
If he was serious on a relationship,he might not consider you for that.If he is bright enough,i know hewent back n asked himself questions about you,likeeeeeeeee"If i laid her today on the first date,who did she meet n get laid by,e.g yesterday,last week n who will lay her next n will it be as easy as it was for me.
Lets jus hope he didnt read anything out of the quickie n you two cud have a future together,in the meantime,kkep your fingers closed n all the best.
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