A
female
age
36-40,
*weettea
writes:Your spouse says they need their privacy and has a password on their computer account that they won't give you. Does this mean they are hiding something or is it harmless? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, DenimandLace44 +, writes (5 October 2010):
 Well since I said "on the other hand" twice, I suppose its good that we have two hands...LOL
A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (5 October 2010):
 Lots of people keep passwords on their computer, many times it's just because they honestly like their privacy to look up state capitals, browse cat videos, or whatever, without someone looking over their shoulder. That said, if he gets twitchy and nervous if you are near his computer, or you talk to him about this or ask to see something and he blows up at you or gets really nervous, he could be hiding something. I wouldn't ask for his password though, many spouses don't know each others passwords and it doesn't mean anything.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2010): I have passwords on my computer, email, facebook, etc that my wife doesn't have, and I have nothing to hide. It is just a case that I like my privacy and not absolutely everything in my life needs to be in full view of my wife. That doesn't mean that I am cheating or would cheat. It just means that we are two separate individuals and we both have a right to privacy. (she also doesn't give me her passwords, nor would I ask for them)
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A
female
reader, DenimandLace44 +, writes (5 October 2010):
I am a person who is both open and one who likes my privacy.
I do tend to share things that I look back on and think "why in the heck did I say all of that?"
On the other hand, although I have personal friends and private texts ect...my hubby does know my password. He could check it at any time. I don't think he ever has or ever will. But he can.
On the other hand, if he was constantly spying and accusing me of things that were true only in his mind...I would learn to be more secretive. Just as a matter of principle. I don't like people getting in my purse...never let my kids do it. I don't like my hubby to unless I have asked him to for some reason. I have nothing in it that is a secret, I just feel violated. I never check my hubbys phone, nor look in his wallet. If he began acting suspiciously, I would perhaps.
The answer to your question in my opinion, is yes he is hiding something.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (5 October 2010):
I don't agree with the post below. He shouldn't need to get rid of his password or give it to you to satisfy your own insecurity. Couples should be able to have their own space and privacy. You shouldn't need to be checking up on him and searching through e-mails and such. The point of a relationship is that there is trust. And that takes work. Trust does not come from knowing someone's passwords. Even if you knew it, he could start a new email address and hide it.
If you have reason to suspect he's hiding something, then tell him just that. If your only problem is that he has a password, then you need to be looking at your own insecurities.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (5 October 2010):
 Well if it is worrying you that much then maybe you should ask him what it is that is so private that he has to have a password on it, tell him it is making you feel like he has something to hide, and if he still doesnt get rid of the password or show you whats on it then he is'nt regarding your feelings.
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