A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi,So I’ve been in my first and only age gap relationship for six months, we met at work and both thought the other was closer in age. For the most part it hasn’t been an issue but recently I’ve found the level of maturity has been really starting to bother me. Latently it seems like if we have an argument it’s always my fault, I apologize mostly because I like to pick my battles and I know I can have a temper and say things I don’t mean out of anger. We got into a really stupid argument over something really small at work because I told her not to do something really small and stupid which gets me in trouble with our boss, which led to her saying how awful of a superior I am, and just putting me down and making me feel horrible. I have my own opinions on her work ethic but because we have a relationship I don’t bring them up as she’s rather sensitive, I also find she pulls a lot of things because we are in a relationship which I’ve brought up before. For example we are to have two breaks equalling out to fifty minutes, I make sure everyone has theirs before I do, and the same hour which is the least busiest and I will sometimes nod off, which she knows and I have my assistant who is capable of running the shift without me always there to help, this makes me the worst supervisor there is and unprofessional, i see my break as my time to do what I want, I’m never out of the store, just in the back if they need me. But hearing this multiple times is really starting to get to me, especially as she is not the best worker but has so many opinions on how everything should be done. I’m really starting to feel as if this entire relationship was a big mistake, I was hesitant and didn’t want to pursue this because of our age gap, but she was very persistent and although I know I’m not perfect I feel as if I’m always to blame and because of personal issues I’m always suppose to forgive her behaviour and feel as if my feelings don’t count because she’s had a harder time with things lately than I have. Should I just walk away? Thanks for listening and any advice I receive.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2018): You could view this as mixing work and pleasure which often is a mistake.
If you intend to separate you should have a back up plan where you start applying for new jobs.
In a way you have put your neck on the line.
You cant ask her to leave the job as its unproffessional so you have to apply for something else.
It could be better for you as you are feeling stressed out.?
The only other option is an amicable breakup, maybe even a tapering off of time spent together but whatever you decide to do try not to invest too much in work drama or play drama as this is draining for you.
Maybe reinforcing the friendship side and slowing down the sex side would help but is it possible for you to reclaim more personal space and time in order to sort yourself out?
If you readjust your priorities you will get beyond this fatigue.
See a doctor and discuss why you are so tired.
After all it may have a medical cause such as anemia.
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