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*.x..Lauren..x..
writes: JUST WANTING OPPINIONS COZ IM CURIOUS.Hey, I was just wondering that people though of sex at a legal age... What are your views? do you think teenagers should wait til there 16 before losing there virginity or do you think when the times right its ok? I personally think losing your virginity isnt that bigga deal. i mean it doesnt change you in any way to be honest and as long as its not a one night stand its ok... Im still a virgin (im 14) but i think people over-react about teenagers and what they get up to.. a lot of my mates arent virgins but as long as they use protection and arent stupid i dont mind at all.... well message me or reply to this, thanks ..x..Lauren..x..
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female
reader, chunkymunky  +, writes (17 April 2006):
 Most people nowadays do see the consequences e.g teenage pregnancy because we do have much better sex education that alot of people think. And not everyone is doing it 'just to fit in' or impress their friends or what ever. You may not think it but there are alot of commited teenagers in serious relationships in which they feel secure enough to have sex.
I dont think sex education should be taught at a lower age because to be honest, i wouldnt of listened and it wouldnt of changed my views atall. I had sex education when I was 11 and ever since then I have been taught it every year. I know all the risks and people underestimate how much we do actually already know about sex. But yes I know some people do just have sex to impress their mates, or because they feel pressured but I just wanted to say, its not always the case.
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 April 2006): I think it does matter. When you are under 16 or age of maturity, most people don't know the consequences. These consequences are life alternating. Pregnancy or std's changes your life forever.
I believe that even if there wasn't an age of constent that people should wait for the one. For one main reason the consequences. Also sex is better when there is love. I lost my virginity to my boyfriend who i am still with today at 17. I love him and we didn't rush into anything. It was more than a year into the relationship and I knew he was the one. Now we are still together and planning to marry.
The most important thing for you to do is to wait until you are ready and not have sex because "everyone is doing it" as in reality most aren't. If you have to have sex to be friends with someone then they aren't your true friends. Take your time and remember you will also remember your first time and you only have one chance. So make it worth while with someone you actually love.
Good Luck
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female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (13 April 2006):
 The problem with sex in early teen years is that you barely even know what you're after. Is it orgasm? Is it companionship? Is it status? Is it luuuurrrve? Is it just curiosity?
If you're after orgasm, there are myriad ways to achieve that without sexual penetration! If it's companionship, you can have close intimacy with friends of both genders, and without sex, too. You can love someone without involving your genitals. If you're only have sex so you can say that you've "done it", you can go the route of many millions of humans before you and make it up (who'd know?).
But mostly, I think a lot of young teens have sex because they're curious about what it's like and/or they think "everyone else is" because they've seen images in the media.
But sex under those circumstances is generally really disappointing, particularly to young women. The most common question asked by girls after their first sexual experience is "Was that it?" Followed by: "Why didn't I come?"
Modern media give a really unrealistic picture of sex - picturing it as instantly pleasurable and emotionally binding for both partners (which it certainly can be, but not if you're fumbling around in secret, afraid your parents are going to find out). It gives teens unfulfillable expectations and misleads you into believing that you're the ONLY PERSON ON EARTH not having rampant rumpy-pumpy. (Note: you're not.)
And then there's the issue of STIs and pregnancy. Hundreds of thousands of years of experience in human sexuality shows that young adults tend to "have sex now, think about contraception later", leading to all sorts of unexpected outcomes and unplanned pregnancies... and kids having kids is really heart-wrenching and pathetic.
Lastly, teen girls especially tend to confuse sex with love and affection, something that teen boys rarely do. What tends to happen is that girls think they're sharing something rare and special with a man they love... and the boys just see sexual release, with no special feelings involved. Eventually there's confusion and unhappiness all around. Better to wait a bit until both sexes are emotionally more mature about the matter, don't you think?
Naturally, I'm speaking generally, and yes I *know* that there are going to be exceptions to each of my statements. But don't forget that the "people" you mention who "overreact" to "what teenagers get up to" used to be -- hey, insight! -- teens themselves. We remember. Oh yes, we remember. The difference between a 14-year-old (you) and a 44-year-old (me) is mainly that I now have the wisdom of 30 years of mistakes and heartbreak to help me analyse my choices back then.
Things were not as different as you think for us Oldies. We remember that teens can make stupid choices (many of us did, and some of us did it before contraception and abortion were options!) and the laws about sexual consent are there for reasons you can't see now, but you'll grow to understand when you've had a few decades of adult interaction under your belt.
If it's any interest to know, yours is just the most recent generation to wonder why The Elder Generation (that daggy, outdated geriatric set!) is hellbent on dictating the age of sexual consent. My generation wondered too, and in another 10-15 years, you'll find that you feel a bit smug and indulgent when today's toddlers are making the same comments.
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female
reader, Angelicc +, writes (13 April 2006):
 I believe that you should wait until your 16 because once you lost you virginity you've lost you last piece of innocence, you've lost the last piece that makes you a child. 16 are meant to the age you react a level of maturity where you can handle of repercussions. So yea it is a big deal.
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male
reader, d4u04 +, writes (13 April 2006):
 My honest opinion is that the age shouldn't be lowered, because the more you lower an age of conscent, the younger people having sex become to look big and clever in front of their friends. Which is also why Britain has the highest rate of teens pregnancies in the western world. I think if a lot more was done in schools from a younger age to warn against the risks of having unprotected sex then my opinion would probably change.
I lost my virginity at 13, which i now regret because it was barely sex anyway, just stupid teenagers doing it for the sake of it, very bumpy and unco-ordinated, not worth the hassle it caused, trust me! That is also why I can get on my soap box about it now, because I've been there and done it, and wished I hadn't. I just wish that so many teenagers wouldn't have sex just to fit in because 'everyone' else is having it. Which probably also isn't true, they are probably saying it to fit in aswel!
End of rant lol...
x
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