A
male
age
51-59,
*ayn
writes:My best friend and I live together. We love each other very much, to the point that we function as each other's significant other. Many of our friends (and enemies) think of us as a couple. This has only been going on for 6 months. We are also in a rock band together. "Wes" and I have discussed our love for each other way too much--even though we seem to get off on these discussions. Everything appears to be great.But my sexual history is with both women and men. And Wes's sexual history is only with men. He says that he's not sexually interested in men, and claims to be possibly "biromantic." He has had one intense love interest with a woman over the past year. His history with women and romance is sincere--and really straight I believe--but very spotty. Like me, Wes has a problematic attitude towards women. [Are they gal pals or sex objects? Why do women and men appear to be so different, maybe incompatible? Is sex with women mainly about conquest? How important is it to have a big penis? etc.]He and I often sleep together, we massage and caress and cuddle and talk love talk, we rarely have our hands off each other when we're together. Our bonding sessions are quite erotic at this point. I would say we spend at least 3 hours a day in bed having some foreplay with only briefs on. Of course we get erections. Two sticking points.Two things bug me: 1, Wes insists on making it clear that we are not actually "boyfriends"--maybe platonic lovers--and that he falls in love only with girls. 2, we don't get so far as orgasm, and while we are having foreplay he likes to talk about girls. Also, he wants us to have a 3-way with a girl so we can have sex totally while making it seem hetero!How gay or bi is my friend? In many ways he is so passive during our intimacy that it seems that he's not attracted to me and just wants attention. And I've never seen him show any interest in other men. Just in women.What's going on in his head and heart and groin? After months of this mystery--which has become quite public and involved our friends and family--I just give up.How gay is my friend? And what should I do soon to resolve our overly complicated relationship?z
View related questions:
best friend, erection, foreplay, orgasm, sexual past Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, yukiakashi  +, writes (8 October 2008):
 no problem. I hope you guys keep being friends
A
male
reader, zayn +, writes (8 October 2008):
zayn is verified as being by the original poster of the question thanks for answering. well, i did discuss it with him and he got pissed about how sick fags were. i'm sure he has issues. but i can't fix his head. we've backed off the physical stuff. i want our friendship to survive. thanks again.
...............................
A
female
reader, yukiakashi +, writes (6 October 2008):
Uh let's see... You're bi, no? Well from what you've written I gather you're a bi. So anyway, the point is that you love your friend and he loves you back and you have foreplay, just that he makes it seen he's bi. Why don't you ask him? He obviously knows himself better. Ask him. But from my perspective, I think he's gay.
...............................
|
