A
female
age
41-50,
*reehuggingnaturelover
writes:My partner and have an 11 month old and have had a few financial difficulties over the last year. We both want more kids (I'm thinking 2, he wants 3) later on when I'm finished with school, financially caught up, and have a ring on my finger (Something more I don't want until I'm financially caught up). The problem is this- Lately he has been saying things like "Sarah" needs a friend. Meaning, a sibling. I think she has plenty in daycare for now. As last month was especially hard, I was unable to purchase my bc, and immediately, during a time when he was focused on nothing else, let him know that we'd have to use a condom every time for the next month. Since then, I've woken up to him having sex with me 4 times now, and found that he was condomless... When they are right next to our bed. And now I think I am pregnant. Am I paranoid/ does anyone else uphold my suspicions that he is trying to get me pregnant again, or could he possibly have forgotten? I'm afraid to bring it up to him due to our financial problems in case this has been an oversight.
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female
reader, Blondy +, writes (30 July 2009):
 From what you've said, yes it sounds like he is trying to get you pregnant. You told him that he would have to use condoms because you're not on birth control and he just 'forgot'? 4 times??? I highly doubt that, especially since he's been hinting that he wants another now. It definately sounds like he is trying to get you pregnant again. And also, he has sex with you while you are sleeping, isn't that a bit strange? I know I would be freaked out if that happened to me. Thats not normal is it? Yes I think he is trying to get you pregnant, which is really bad because having a child on purpose is supposed to be a decision made by BOTH of the parents, not just him. Talk to him, tell him to STOP and just wait. He knows you want another one so just tell him you guys can't afford it (you can't afford the one you have now, how does he not see that?) and wait until you've done all the things you said you want to do. I think this is very disrespectful of him and I would tell him off. You also might want to check to see if he poked holes in the condoms, my little brother did that to my parents and thats how they got my next little brother.
A
female
reader, cheysula +, writes (30 July 2009):
"I've woken up to him having sex with me 4 times now"Whoa! It sounds to me like he's ambushing you with sex. Unless he used to do that habitually prior to the current situation, I would definitely agree that he's trying to get you pregnant.If you are pregnant now, I guess there's not too much you can do about it, unless you want to leave him. Let him know that you're on to him, though. And make it clear it can't happen again. His behavior has been disrespectful and irresponsible in the extreme.In the meantime, take it as a blessing. Things will work out. And since your partner started the mess, this is the time to make sure that he accepts the work load for taking care of you and the future baby!P.S. If you consider abortion, get one as early as possible, and plan time to recover. It hurts your body almost as much as actually giving birth.
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