A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm 14 and my bf is 16 we've been dating for nearly a year and we both wana take our relation ship to the next level we both wana have sex but im scared to and he knows this, hes been trying to help me get over my fear it's been like 2 months but im still scared.I love my bf so much hes so understanding he says if im to scared then we wont.but i really want to does any one have any advice for me. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, xmelissajanex  +, writes (6 October 2007):
wo wo wo your fourteen there's no way your ready for that kiind of step yet. its a really big step in a relationship and it changes every thing, you really need to consider if your ready for that not matter what pressure he might put on your or how frightened you are you'll lose him if you dont. if he says he doesnt want to be with you if you say no then you need to find someone your own age that wont make ou feel the need to take this step.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2007): well you just get over it have sex with him trust me it wont hurt after like 15 minutes the first ten minutes it will because youre still a virgin ? so try it but be careful because sex is addicting depeding on how good it was and little more addvice talk nasty real nasty good luck have fun
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A
female
reader, Emzy1591 +, writes (5 October 2007):
 If your scared you blatently not ready. neither are you legally old enough to have sexDont do it
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2007): hey im 16 and i was just wondering what is it that's scaring you? is it that you're scared of getting pregnant? because you should trying going on the pill and use protection. if you are scared of like diseases or something, the condom should help that too.
To me, it sounds like you both like each other alot and you back. good luck with your decision. but i wouldnt do it if you dont think you are fully ready. :]
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A
female
reader, justagyrl +, writes (5 October 2007):
I know I might sound like your mother but listen to me. I was 14 when I lost my V. It was a mistake and I could never get it back. I was so young that I had know idea what I was doing and it was not very pleasing. Tell your bf that your scared and that you guys should wait longer. An easy way to do that is to pick a later date, such as Feb 1 (how ever long you feel comfortable with). Tell him that until then that you don't want to discuss the issue at ALL. You will not believe the pressure that this will take off your relationship. So when this date comes around discuss the issue again and if your ready your ready, if your not your not. Please make sure that you bf knows that that date does NOT mean that you are going to have sex with him, just that you will DISCUSS the possibility. I hope this helps you.
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A
female
reader, Fairy_Lu +, writes (5 October 2007):
 Your really young and he could get into trouble for having sex with you, and your scared and that just shows that your not ready for sex, wait till you feel ready and if he respects you he will wait too, sex isnt the most important thing in a relationship trust is.
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A
female
reader, TELLULAH +, writes (5 October 2007):
 Hi Honey,
If your that scared then your not ready. Ask him to wait a while longer till you feel comfortable, and it will happen naturally. Your only 14 so whats the rush?.
If your worried that it will hurt, it does a little but its not that bad. I still think you should wait though.
XX
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2007): I have plenty of advice for you.
You're far too young. Save yourself until you're a lot older. At your age it's illegal. You run the risk of not only finding yourself pregnant, you'll have an increased likelihood of developing cervical cancer in later years through having sex at your age. That's a killer disease, you know.
You're frightened of having sex which is plenty good enough a reason for not having it. When the time is really right you won't have any fears and everything will seem right.
Do yourself a big favour and keep yourself to yourself for the time being.
Phil
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A
female
reader, Playgal +, writes (5 October 2007):
 At the end of the day there is nothing to be scared of if you love each other then he should take it easy on your first time it shows that you do love each other not saying that you have to do it but do it when myou are ready dont let him force you in to anything!!!!
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