A
female
age
36-40,
*ischa1987
writes:I want to feel beautiful and desirable?But I hate my body so desperately, I find it very hard to get into exercise and hard to give up the foods I want, even though I don't eat that much of them, and have cut down a lot as well. I don't drink or smoke and I take care of my skin...but I am nervous of being naked for the guy I like because I hate my body and I hate my breasts, I could deal with being a curvy woman if I had larger breasts to even out my body but....ugh *sigh* I cry that nobody will want me or want my body....I feel so ugly and I really want to be sexy and feel gorgeous when I am naked in front of him...
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2011): From a conservative boy from another European country:
Why should you be naked before your boyfriend? You are not married, are you? It is no problem to let wait until you are emotionally ready for it.
But I am sure that since he is your boyfriend, he loves the way you look!
A
female
reader, girlwhoneedshelp  +, writes (7 March 2011):
 You cannot keep this up because you could push away someone who really cares for you and for whom this will not be an issue. Women come in all different shapes and sizes. This is what makes us so damn wonderful! Men love curvy women. It gives them something to hold onto in the bedroom and something to cuddle up to on the sofa.
I'm more than sure that all these worries are in your head and are probably getting worse and worse the more you dwell on them. Just relax and start to focus on the parts of your body that you do like. Surely there must be something? Even if it's as silly as your calves or hands. Focus on something that you like. If you let your partner see you naked imagine how wonderful you would feel if he told you he thought you looked sexy? And he wouldn't be lying because he loves you for you.
We have all felt like this. Nobody is perfect. If your breast really are an issue for you have you thought about seeing a consultant or even speaking to your GP about breast augmentation? Maybe you should leave your bra on the first few times you are with your partnet just until you get settled with showing the rest of you. That will build up your confidence for taking it off!
You need to stop worrying. We are all beautiful no matter what shape or size. Please give my advice a try!
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A
female
reader, girlwhoneedshelp +, writes (7 March 2011):
You cannot keep this up because you could push away someone who really cares for you and for whom this will not be an issue. Women come in all different shapes and sizes. This is what makes us so damn wonderful! Men love curvy women. It gives them something to hold onto in the bedroom and something to cuddle up to on the sofa.
I'm more than sure that all these worries are in your head and are probably getting worse and worse the more you dwell on them. Just relax and start to focus on the parts of your body that you do like. Surely there must be something? Even if it's as silly as your calves or hands. Focus on something that you like. If you let your partner see you naked imagine how wonderful you would feel if he told you he thought you looked sexy? And he wouldn't be lying because he loves you for you.
We have all felt like this. Nobody is perfect. If your breast really are an issue for you have you thought about seeing a consultant or even speaking to your GP about breast augmentation? Maybe you should leave your bra on the first few times you are with your partnet just until you get settled with showing the rest of you. That will build up your confidence for taking it off!
You need to stop worrying. We are all beautiful no matter what shape or size. Please give my advice a try!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2011): I totally understand how you feel, Im a bit curvy but with really small (B-cup) breasts that I dont feel fit my body at all, and I have a little trick... Lingerie! It makes you feel sexy and soft and feminine and lovely and you can get some really nice stuff for not that much, at places like La Senza! But the trick is getting stuff that makes you feel amazing and sexy and that hides anything that you arent confident about, so for me, I like things like satin teddies and little nighties because they are really sexy/cute and dont create any lumps or bumps like suspenders and corsets can do if they dont fit perfectly! It helps give me confidence and then as I feel better I can be naked sometimes! :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2011): Clothes make a HUGE difference. If you feel really sexy in what you're wearing before you take it off, the feeling continues.. So invest in some sexy fitted underwear, that makes you feel comfortable and good, and wear an outfit that you feel super-confident in. Eat lots of bananas, they have a chemical in that make you feel better about your body. The same one that's in chocolate, but obviously chocolate can easily flip the effect and make you feel bad too. Don't give up the foods you like, you'll just make yourself unhappy, and that's counter-productive. Do try and do a tiny bit of exercise though, it releases endorphins in your brain which make you feel happier and will help you feel sexier.
I hate my breasts too, but I'm from the other end of the scale.. I think they're too big and grotesque. I would much prefer smaller breasts. Just goes to show, we often want what we can't have, and perfection really is too often a moving milestone that's ultimately unreachable. And everyone has different opinions. You'll probably find that the guy you like will love your breasts. Most guys love breasts full stop. They don't care about the details, because hell, they get to see some boobs!
I used to feel terrible about my body. I used to think it would always be impossible that any guy could ever want me. And what made that go away? Strangely enough, having sex. It gave me the confidence that I was attractive enough. So you might find, that if you go for it with your guy, he'll love your body, and tell you so, and then you'll finally know you shouldn't hate your body and you're not as ugly as you think you are.
Good luck being sexy, if I can, anyone can!
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A
female
reader, Battista +, writes (7 March 2011):
OP you don't need to worry about this. I'm sure you are your harshest critic.
If you aren't happy with the way you look you are the only one who can change that. Yes it is hard to get into exercise and stop eating unhealthy foods, but it's not impossible by any means and lots of people do it. It just depends how keen you are to take some action. Exercise can be as simple as walking more, swimming or playing a game of tennis. Dancing even. It's not hard to get into these sort of activities.
If you are that worried about things then do something about it, don't just sit there crying. That is completely destructive behaviour. Exercise has all sorts of physical and mental benefits. You'll soon notice a difference.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2011): Girl , you are worrying too much about it....don't be scared. None of us are perfect. Highlight your best assets...wear some nice , sexy lingerie...IF this is your first night together try to make it special...candles, music...the works...Just be yourself...it'll all be good. :) :)
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A
male
reader, dirtball  +, writes (7 March 2011):
 Your boyfriend doesn't care. You're attractive to him just the way you are. If you weren't, he wouldn't be with you.
There are all different kinds of beauty. Learn to love yourself, that's very attractive no matter what size you are.
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