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I'm intrigued by my female teacher but I'm not gay, so what is going on?

Tagged as: Forbidden love, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (28 December 2007) 7 Answers - (Newest, 23 June 2010)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

So heres the deal im 15 and my teachers 40. I dont know if its infatuation or developing into love but sometimes the way she looks at me or approaches me I could really have a chance with herbut then other times I know its impossible. Im thinking about telling her how I feel when I graduate cause I wouldnt dare do anything that could ruin her reputation or destroy her career.The bad things are thats shes a she and im a she and im not gay but its just something about her and shes also married. Can someone please help me??

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2010):

Hey guys I feel exactly the same about my Pe teacher I have just started secondary school this year. So I'm 12 nearly 13 first we had a teaher for some subjects and then we changed to my current teacher. At first I didn't even no I felt this way but these last few weeks my mind has been running over drive and all I can think about is her. She is married and doesn't have any children. I haven't told anyone I feel this way as I am scared what they will think I love her so much and want To spend every single moment with her. I don't intend to tell her untill I leave but if she has left school before me should I tell her I am not going to tell her now because I would hate do jepodise her career . Does this mean I'm gay or bi sexual I'm not even sure if she is interested as she is in her late twenties. I don't no what to do this is upsetting me so much please help me x

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 June 2010):

Just want to say. I also had a crush with my female teacher. It started when I was 17. My teacher is in her 40-ies, has husband and children. I didn´t know what to do, tell her or what? I thought these feeling could wash away but they never and what was the most worrying I felt deep inside of me, she also likes me very much. When I was leaving the school I went to say goodbye to her, and she cried like a little child. I gave her a little paper with saying that she makes my world a better place. We stayed and keep in touch every single month, but I was quite frustrated because I thought about her everywhere I went. So half year later, after my left from school, I decided to tell her that I love her. I had a fear of loosing her, but I wanted to start live without thinking about her all day long.

All I remember is she was very suprised, but she told me she just needs some time. I gave it to her.

Now... after two years we still keep in touch, she is very special part of my life and of my myself.

And all I want to say is: If you really feel to tell her, do it. Because you may regret the things you don´t say than the things you do say.

If she likes you, if she wants, and if you are worth for her, she will understand. Even though it could take some time. We are all just human beings.

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A female reader, crazyobsessed United States +, writes (29 May 2010):

I just wanted to give you a different perspective. I started having feeling for a female teacher at the beggining of freshman year and still have feelings for this woman a decade later. She is the best person in my life. That being said, I would never risk losing her by telling her these things. They are my own private secret. Just be happy to have this person in your life. If you really care about her then you don't want to make problems in her life.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2007):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I just wanted to thank you guys for the advice. Im still debating wether or not im going to tell her after I graduate, like I said before I wouldnt even think about telling her now. I guess it justdepends how I feel after I graduate.

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A female reader, red1982 United Kingdom +, writes (28 December 2007):

This is quite normal at your age - I had a crush on my female english teacher ( i'm now married with two children).

It's because your hormones are all over the place and you admire this teacher.

I'm sure these feelings will dwindle over time and by the time you graduate you won't even feel like this anymore so don't worry too much about telling her.

This doesn't mean you are gay, and you are not abnormal. Give it a few months and I'm sure you will meet someone else. That's what happens at this age.

I wish you luck.

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom + , writes (28 December 2007):

kenny agony auntI think that this is just a stage that you are going through, its nothing more than a crush, and crushes tend to be quite short lived. Its like when he have a thing for movie stars, sport's people, musicians ect, it does not last forever. I would refrain from telling her and just admire her from afar and let your feelings die down naturally.

All the best x

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A female reader, hello1 United Kingdom +, writes (28 December 2007):

hello1 agony auntEver heard of a girl crush? loads of girl have them, I still get them at 18 but never on a teacher mind you. She's your teacher, just look at her from afar and maybe you can tell her after you graduate? One of my freinds fancied an male teacher, she told him how she felt. It actually helped her deal with her feeling in the end.

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