A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Recently, I started a sexual relationship with this woman...We've only had sex a handful of times, but I may have grown attached already...We talk all the time, even after we've had a night of passion haha...We have a slight problem though...She's one of my brothers best friends and she doesn't know how/if she should tell him..I do understand this cos I've played out multiple scenarios in my head and I know that there is a chance that her and my brother could have trouble with their friendship if he found out...She wants to tell him about us but doesn't want anything to hurt their friendship...I want to tell both her and my brother that I like her...I know my brother wont mind..I just dont know how she'll react to it...The last few times I told a person I liked them, it blew up in my face almost immediately after I told them..So I guess I'm airing on the side of caution here too...I'm kind of unsure of what to do...I'm afraid if I tell her she might think over-react and end this little fling...But I'm also afraid if there's actually something here between us and I dont tell I like her, that she'll lose interest and I'll lose her...It feels like a catch 22...I'd really like some advice on the matter...I've been out of the dating game for over a year and I'm having a bit of a confidence crisis getting back in...Thanks in advance...Any advice would be appreciated :)
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female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (26 August 2012):
As far as telling her you're interested in her, maybe you should go a round about way of asking her.
Instead of telling her, "Hey, I like you. Do you like me?" Play it out a little differently...like ease into it. The first scenario is scary because you're putting your feelings out there and asking if the feelings are reciprocal. So instead of telling her how you feel, ask her how she feels (which women like btw). Just ask her how she feels about he "relationship" you're in and if she wants it to go anywhere. If she says she likes it the way it is and doesn't see it going any further then you can just leave it at that and either leave things the way they are or decide if maybe you should let it go.
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