A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have posted a few questions on here usually when I feel really bad. I have felt really bad for a long time. I figured things couldn't get any worse, but today I logged on to facebook to see a nice girl I really liked was in a relationship with someone, and all her friends were excited for their love. I've never felt such a horrible feeling at seeing something, I literally almost threw up. I haven't told any of my housemates or friends, no one knows that I liked her. Around my housemates I tried to do normal stuff with them today, but I had this horrible burning feeling every time I thought about it. I'm 22 and I realised now that I don't have a chance with any girls at university. I'm from another country and I hate it here. I want to go home, I'm so sick and alone. My late teens and early 20's and I haven't had a girlfriend at all. I felt so bad last semester that I did really bad on my exams and coursework. To be honest, I haven't felt "good" for the years I've been here. I don't know what to do, whether I should just give up call my parents and go home or what. I'm considering emailing my family or going to see a university counselor, but I've never done anything like that and I don't want to look weak and want to be anonymous. I've never failed so bad at life as I have in the last few years. Does anyone have any advice? I'm in such a deep rut.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI would like to have (safe) fun, but I have no one to have fun with. I am bored out of my mind, and I do all these activities to try and block my mind from the one thing I want, a girlfriend. I play video games, go to the gym, go to lectures, study, hang out with house mates, watch every single movie, watch every tv show, cook, play sports, organize my stuff, go shopping, but all the while thinking I wish that I had someone. My siblings all had bf/gf at and before my age, my parents were married younger than me, my friends all have gfs, why did I have to be the dud? I'm the only one who can't find anyone. Maybe I'm just a complete loser.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2011): you're so young..i bet you've heard it before and you're tired of hearing it again but here it is again: you're still young. get a new hobby, don't think too much about getting a girlfriend..your time will come. for now, just take your time in developing yourself, doing things your way and make new friends and meet new people. I know many people your age (i'm a girl and felt the same at your age) who are going through what you're experiencing but today I regret worrying so much....everything will fall into place, just enjoy life!
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A
male
reader, Welsh Uncle Dave +, writes (18 February 2011):
Firstly, you should never shy away from your weakeness, you should confront them. If that means seeing a uni counsellor then so be it.As for a not having a girlfriend during your late teens/early 20s - what's the big deal? Not everyone does. There are plenty of others like you.It's not compulsory to have one and you should take just anyone just to have a gf. Why would you want to tie yourself down at such a young age?You're single, accept it and stop looking for a gf because the more and harder you look, the more frustrated you will get. One will come when you least expect it.In the mean time, make the most of single life and have (safe) fun.
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